Friday, 11 April 2008

I Initially Wanted to Just Write a Few Words, but...

Just short updates to let you know that:
  • My domestic goddess-ness paid off yesterday and I actually managed to cook a delicious meal without burning my kitchen off! Ooops, I just declared how amazing of a cook I was yesterday, I shouldn't be saying that now, should I? I'm pretty proud of myself cos the dish was top item! Despite cooking the entire two packages of mushroom, it was finished on a single scoop. Well, actually, my sister and I were the only ones who ate it, so I guess that could be just pretty biased, eh? Or maybe we were simply gluttonous. But! I'm thinking positive, positive, positive! I must be an excellent cook! I have this image of me opening up my own restaurant which serves all my homemade dishes and everybody just can't get enough of them, the place is packed the whole day and I'll be the next Rachael Ray, and get offered my own television show...Okay, stop, seriously.
  • Exam's tomorrow and I can't be even more unprepared. Was spending the whole day at Holland Village with friends to study, yeah, right. The intention was noble but not so much the execution. I don't really care much about coloratura soprano, opera comique, post and lintel architectural structure, blah, blah, blah. If I don't care about my own nails, why would I care about...uh..full round sculpture?!!

Was talking to my friend earlier and he complained about how sick he was of his job. Man, I'm so not cut out for this, I'm not made to enter the corporate world, I'm highly unmotivated and too much of a free spirit. What if I can't do it? People can stay in the same company for years and I don't know how they do it, I'll go mental of the routinity of it, and of course as your career proceeds, you gain more power and you're more in control of the work, you face more challenges and responsibilities and they say it gets better once that happens, but I don't know, man, does everyone feel the same way, really? Or am I just the one being irrational?

I'm just glad at least now I still have school and somehow I still have the option to work or not to work, but even in this internship everyone in the company keeps telling me to think whether this is what I want to do for a career because if so, then I should voice it out. But I don't even know what I want, and it's way too early to think about it when I've only been working there for a month. I have no plan as for tomorrow, let alone if I'm going to keep this job permanently.

To tell you the truth, being an adult scares me. An adult meaning, when you're faced with chances and you're free to choose whatever you want. I've always known what I'm supposed to do, after high school there's no question that I should go to college and university, but then what happens after? Expectations are higher but people don't tell you which way to go anymore, they just want you there, and it's up to you to figure out how to get there, and it's a little bit scary, especially when on most times I don't even know what I'll have for dinner. I know everybody goes through the same thing, and maybe I'm just worrying too much, after all, the thought is always scarier than the real thing. I don't know. I still want to be a kid, knowing I'm doing something right for sure and knowing I can always fall back on someone when things go wrong.

I'm officially babbling, aren't I? 'Short' updates? Yeah, right. There's no such thing as short post in my dictionary. But it's getting late and I have to wake up early tomorrow, and I'm just starting to get a little bit nervous about my exam. Ought I should re-read the materials once again before I go to bed. Wish me luck, people! I'll need plenty of it!

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