Wednesday 26 March 2008

Simple Act

It doesn't take that much to make my day and I'm not that hard to please. In this sense, I'm very sensitive, because annoying people piss me off tremendously and nice people just, well, make me happy, even when they come in various shapes and sizes. Oh, I mean, ages and..whatever.

This morning I encountered the nicest taxi driver ever. Reason why I took taxi wasn't because I felt rich, or not because I just didn't want to to mix with commoners, I swear that's not it. Well, the real reason was much simpler and embarrassing at the same time. Basically it took me a great deal to just pick what to wear for the day, and just to make matters worse, it's not like my wardrobe is screaming 'fabulous' or 'so-many-varieties-you-can-pick-whatever-and-look-nice'! Formal attires, somemore! The amount of formal shirts I own could put everyone to shame. So I spent too much time deciding what to wear and too little time on running after the bus. Bugger.

So the taxi driver was all smiley which was almost always a good sign, of course smiling itself can mean a lot of different things. But as far I could tell, it wasn't a mischievous or an evil pyschotic smile so I was at ease. He kept talking to me throughout the journey and he even complimented my english (although you should hear me speak english in the morning, it couldn't be called 'speaking' rather than just 'slurring), but as self centered as I am, him flattering me wasn't the reason why he lifted me spirit up. Of course it wasn't! What do you take me for?!

I didn't have cash so he took me to ATM first and when he dropped me in my work place, he kept saying thank you as if without me he would have ran out of business right there and then. Suddely I felt very heroic! There should be an Indonesian flag and the national song playing in the background! (huh?)

I might not find the cure for AIDS yet, and I might have never donated my precious AB-type blood ever before, but at least I helped a really nice taxi driver from the prospect of selling his taxi for his kids' pocket money!

Okay, I sound awful. Rewind.

So yeah. Just a tiny act of friendliness like that is nice, really. It doesn't hurt to smile anyway, right?

Anyway, I'm kinda tired today. So will write again next time, then. Just two more days til end of this working days! *Gosh, remind me again why I decided to work when I could lay around on my ass all day long?!*

Monday 24 March 2008

I've seen a better Monday

What certainly don't you need on a tiring Monday evening after a busy day at work?

You might answer with one simple word, e.g, a stalker, or perhaps, more than one word, like, a fight with your boyfriend? Yes, yes, sure, that would be crappy.

But, but, but! 'Low and behold! If my Monday could get any worse, I might consider arsenic! Or maybe just an aspirin.

I spent nearly two hours just to get home! Ha-ha-ha, funny, is it? No! Was it some kind of a cross-country trip? But the fact that I've wasted two hours of my life which I would never get back isn't the only thing driving me mad. Okay, so let me tell you from the beginning.

The moment I stepped out of the office I realized that my mood was going to go downhill from there, no amount of pulleys could possibly lift it up, even if Lennox Lewis himself was present. It was raining. But it wasn't just the usual romantic rain you see in the television where two people can chase each other around, kiss passionately and still attract envy. It was a crazy, mind-blowing, super heavy rain! Tiny little me with my tiny little umbrella conquering the heavy weight champion of all rain. There were puddles of water everywhere and by the time I reached my bus stop I was soaked and the bottom of my jeans was practically dripping. The bus stop was so crowded, and I managed to sit in the corner while waiting for my bus, but of course, even just waiting wasn't enough, the rain was too heavy that despite being in the shelter, you still got splashed all over, and what's worse was those private cars which drove super fastly and spattering water everywhere towards me, a wet-looking struggling student from faraway land! Seriously! I didn't even ask for a lift, the least they could do was being a tad bit considerate. When I'm older and rich, I'll be driving in my posh BMW and splashing those struggling students as a revenge, I'm telling you!

I endured this crap for almost half an hour, and by the time my bus finally came, I was this close to actually strangling the bus driver, but my conscience restrained me from doing so, cos then I thought, 'who would drive me home?'. Sod it! The bus too was almost full *bugger!* and the only available seats were the ones in the front, but the roof was leaking and water was dripping right to the empty seats! You've got to be kidding me! I had to sit and endure another hour in the bus when the traffic was awful facing backwards, resulting in a serious nausea in my stomach. Probably I shouldn't have read a book in a moving bus but I was damn bored, okay. Seriously, though, I don't know why I felt particularly nauseaus in the bus, I mean, it's not like I've never sat facing backwards before.

After what it felt like an eternity and more, I alighted and you probably thought, 'okay, things are looking up, she's reaching home already', but you're wrong! While walking a short distance from the bus stop to my apartment, my sandal strap bloody broke! For fuck's sake! I was walking like a bloody spastic as a result! Try walking with a side strapless sandal, okay! I'm not a crab! By this point I wasn't only boiling, I was already vapouring! Meaning, I was way beyond pissed, I was fuuuurriiiouss at the shittiness of my luck. My luck has a shit luck. Ha!

So, really, after taking a bath and after finding out that my bloody hair dryer needs some serious attitude adjusment (cos it's just not a team player, it didn't wanna cooperate), I have ran out of curse words. And based on the brilliant obsevation, I declared that this was the shittiest Monday ever.

'Shitty Monday Club' is hiring new members. Anyone wants to join?

Saturday 22 March 2008

Plan

I have too many ambitions. In my head I have formulated plans to make money, to be a litte more creative, to do things others don't, to think outside the box, and to do something more. I don't plan to succeed much, but I want to do something I can be very proud of. I want to create from scratch. I want to do all kinds of stuffs but I end up not doing anything much, because the starting part is always the hardest, and it doesn't help that I have such short attention span. I tend to get bored easily which results in being very excited about one thing today and just couldn't care less in the next. It's not a very good business-trait, is it?

But I don't want to miss out, and I have to start eventually and put as much dedication as when I first started planning it, and it's one thing I have to promise myself. I realized that I have been putting this off for various excuses; some more justifiable than others. Too busy, for instance, well, everyone's busy these days, we all have jobs and mouths to feed. But it's just the amount of time you want to side aside for this creativity is what matters. It doesn't need to be finished in one day or two, or even a month. Some take months and years to complete, but it always gets easier as we go along, doesn't it? But in my defense, which is true, life hasn't been too kind of me, to us, for the past year so it's not exactly at the top of my priority list, venturing and trying out new things. But again, maybe it's just an excuse too, maybe even if life wasn't so sucky I wouldn't still have had just quite the push to get started and actually do it. Who knows, right?

I learn that it's not easy to work, you get to enjoy it to a certain extent, of course, but there's a lot more into it than just doing what you really like. I work in PR, and I see my colleagues go to various events and awards and get invited to clients' party and all things that seem glamorous and fun, and sure, they are all those things, and more. People don't get to see how these people run around in the office struggling to meet deadlines and cry in frustration when the printer doesn't work or when things go wrong.

What I'm saying is, although it's not easy, we still have to do it. And despite all the hard work, there is always an element of contentment, satisfaction, enjoyment. And maybe that's enough when it comes to it. Maybe I should practise this attitude towards my plan too. Because when we know we have an option to do, or not to do it, given the choice we wouldn't do it for numbers of excuses, when in reality we're just simply lazy.

We all say that we want to save time, but what good does it do: saving time, if nobody uses it? At the end of the day, I just want to do this, for my personal achievement. I need to know that I can do it if only I want to and if I really put my mind into it. And hopefully this time, there will be no excuse. Because excuse doesn't get us anywhere, if anything it will just chain us to the present. It makes us lazy and unmotivated. For once, I want to do something that matters, for myself above anyone else.

As scary and unlikely as it might sound, I've grown up. God knows I still make mistakes and sometimes (okay, mostly) I don't act as my age, I also know I'm still oblivious to most things, but I think I finally learnt. My guidance isn't here anymore but maybe because of that, I'm forced to hang on to myself.

So. No more excuses. Just do it. I've been putting this off for too long, take as much time as I need and just dive in. Just write.

Thursday 20 March 2008

Home for Wedding

I feel exceptionally tired these days because of daily ritual of school and work, but emotionally I'm so deliriously happy. Of course, there's a little fear too, fear that arises when you're with someone, fear which you can't really control. Despite the rational part of the brain telling you that the feeling is based on nothing and it is ridiculous, but subsconsciously it's always there, looming and consuming when you start letting insecurity kicks in.

But I don't want to focus on the fear, because it's just nearly perfect. It's not that I wasn't happy before but there's just a new rush of excitement and laugh every single day. I know I have always had my friends to have fun and bear with my randomness but now I have one person who's just...obligated to take over the job and to me, that's extremely comforting. Ha! But before my mushiness starts to make you wanna gag, I thought I would spare you the agony and talk about something else.

I haven't had time to write recently and I really, really miss it. I miss just being in front of the laptop without thinking about homeworks and jobs. But to make it fair, I enjoy my work, don't get me wrong. It's just that once I get home, have dinner and talk on the phone, suddenly it's midnight again. And I just have to sleep if I don't want to look like a zombie the following day. Is it just me or is my life turning boring or am I just getting old? Not the last two, I hope? Okay, this is depressing.

But, I haven't had the chance to talk about my recent trip home last weekend. It was my cousin's wedding and so my sister and I ditched (sorry, I mean, took a leave) from work and flew home. Even though it was simply too short, we had a blast.


I miss my little sis, Meli! She's talking on and on about how she almost reaches my height! And she's right, dammit. From the way I see it, I'm not growing any taller, so I will always definitely shorter than my older sister, but looks like Meli is growing like tree and by this time (as you can see), she's only inches shorter than me and something tells me by the time I see her again, she'll be able to look down on me, quite literally. Not like I mind if people think I'm the youngest but for the reason that I do look young, please, not because I'm the shortest among us three with the oldest face!


The wedding was a traditional chinese wedding, and to be honest, I couldn't see what was going on because Meli, me, and two of our big brothers had to sit outside the reception room to greet all the incoming guests. By the time I came in the room, every food in sight was nearly finished. I have been eyeing a certain crab asparagus soup from the beginning and I felt totally crestfallen seeing the little stand had closed! Bugger! I want my soup! I want my crab! I want my soup!!!! Supposed I could have thrown a little tantrum there, but my wisdom has well surpassed my age, so I restrained it. I was so proud of myself.

Anyway, you can see a lot more pictures at my multiply site.

That trip back home is definitely the hightlight of this month, and it's not just about the wedding itself. I got to see some distant relatives, some I didn't like very much, but it was nice to see that 'that certain relative' still looked awful as I remembered her to be. So hey, at least it made me feel a bit better. (I know I sounded terrible but don't ask.) But apart from her (and the weird woman in the bathroom), there were great people there! Can you believe I'm already an aunt? It was my first time seeing the little notorious boy, and his dad introduced us by saying, "Jason, meet aunt Christina".

I was in constant horror!
(If this were a movie, this would be the perfect time to play those sudden-loud grave music as the background)

I expressed this near hysteria by saying, "Aunt? Aunt? Can you please, please, please, (almost nearly begging) just call me big sister or something?" I couldn't bear thinking of myself, this hopeless 21-year-old girl can be an aunt to anyone!

Raymond, his dad, being a sweet guy like he is, just laughed and agreed to do exactly that. But the damage has been done. Now I feel like an aunt.


The little firecracker formerly known as Jason. The other one is the happy groom right before make up. He looked pretty normal, didn't he?:) Jason's half Indonesian and Netherland, something tells me he'll be a heartbreaker when he's older!

Have I mentioned that I'm so glad it's holiday?! Promise I'll write more soon (definitely during this weekened!)

Friday 7 March 2008

Can't Get More Random

Am just going to throw in some random, top-of-the-mind, probably (okay, most likely) insignificant, frivolous, and uninteresting thoughts.

Friday at exactly 7.38 pm:

  • I love Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova's performance at the Oscar! Fine, so the show's like..so ancient days ago..but I just saw the video yesterday since I have been busy and I didn't exactly have the energy (you're looking at an old maid, remember?) to watch the show when it aired gazillion days ago (exaggeratement has been long descended in my generation). See the video here, it's just really great to hear a full ensemble of instruments accompanying the song when we've always heard only the guitar-piano version of it. Makes the song even more complete, somehow. Great for them to win the Oscar too! (yeah yeah, again, if this was another scenario and someone was crying for help, that person would have been killed like, fifteen times before I actually realized to react..)
  • Today was hectic at work! I was supposed to finish at 12 and my school wasn't until 2, so thought I would have still had time to walk like a spoilt princess and perhaps grabbed some man..I mean, lunch, before my class. But I had to get something done and I couldn't get out til 1.30 pm, by then I started hypervilenting. I barely made it to class on time and when I got in, everybody was busy reading the text book while I was like, "huh? what textbook?" and apparently, we all had to take quiz! On the first day! With reference to the book, which I didn't even have to begin with. Very classy, girl.
  • I'm having Art class now, and one of the quiz question was 'have you ever seen a concert before?' and I was so enthusiastic cos I remembered Mickey, and Minnie, and Nemo, and Dori. Yeah! I've been to Disney on Ice, haven't I? It might not be 'Les Miserables' or even Maroon 5's concert but hey, it was a performance on stage nevertheless, right? After which we submitted the paper, the lecturer started talking about how we could actually get to enjoy art for free in Singapore (she then referred to the Life section of The Straits Times to prove her point, cos apparently there's a segment specially dedicated to geek...no, I mean, artsy people..you know, admiring gallery, and all..), but then she immediately exclaimed, "but not that Disney on Ice thing, for certain! Ugh! Those Mickey, Minnie and that!" I was totally gobsmacked, feeling defensive suddenly. Hey! I love Mickey, Minnie and 'all that', okay! I've never felt so insulted before, as if someone criticised such fundamental thing about me, like my..mole, or something. It's not as if I could choose it otherwise! Disney is classic okay, it's part of my childhood. Okay, why am I getting so fed up anyway?
  • Back to work subject, I'm supposed to finish this amd-monthly report by Monday, ok! I have no freaking idea on earth how the hell I would get it done! *three exclamation marks*
  • Just saw Project Runway season finale, thought Rami should have won instead. I think he's way too talented not to win! Love that show.
  • I have school tomorrow, bugger! Sure, we have holiday for far too long but now we have school on a Saturday?! Where's the fairness in that? Right? Right? Right?!

They are random, I've warned you that!

Thursday 6 March 2008

Just Been Busy

Yo 'all! Sorry for the abandonement of this site. I'm just preoccupied these days, writing in this has been the least of my concern, although it doesn't mean as bad as it sounds. I've changed workplace, and I have to say it was the right move. I love my work now and everybody's like one big happy family, rather dsyfunctional, but a family nevertheless. It just takes me awhile to actually get there, so location is the only unfortunate thing about it, but other than that, it has been great. And it's PR! I actually do feel important, ha! I set up my work email today and it sounds so professional I almost cried in delight! Okay, that's a bit exaggerating. Still, it feels good.

Okay, aside from being a dork, I'm just........................sleepy. Sorry! Creative cells are dead right now. I have work in the morning and school in the afternoon and movie for the night! Yeay! That's what I call a highly productive day!

Hopefully will write properly over the weekend. Take care everyone:)