Monday, 28 January 2008

Busy Looming Ahead

Yes, this is Monday and reality sinks in. Which is,
(1) I got the job as an intern in a marketing specialist company.
(2) I start working on Wednesday.
(3) Working hour is 8.30 - 6.30
(4) My Advertising make-up exam is this Saturday!

I can feel my youth pass me by. There, it passed.
Welcome to the real world, baby.

Saturday, 26 January 2008

What a Week.

I have been hibernating for months and now that I started functioning as a normal human being like the rest of you, I fell into great exhaustion. Brilliant, don't you think? What am I, 70?! The truth is, I think I just need some getting used to, plus I am still not a morning person. And I think public transportation sucks. Once you rely on 'em, bang! They look away and turn you down, simply left you bruised and traumatized for life. And when you start believing in them again, they would bang! Crash your intestines this time, haven't you learnt anything from the last time? I had my inside crushed a few days ago when I was waiting patiently with faith for the 198 bus. The time showed 8 am. You think most people would have been still in stage-four sleep (I've been learning too much psychology) and stage four means you're in deep deep shit, oops, I mean sleep. But of course I was wrong (I seemed to get everything wrong lately) and when the bus came, it was apparent that we were no longer in a healty relationship, no symbiosis-mutualism, and that 'it' has turned its back on me, literally. The bus didn't even stop, it just simply passed, leaving me with paranoid thoughts and I spent the rest of the day wondering 'where did I go wrong?' It wasn't enough that I had just been dumped by a dead-object, when the second bus arrived ten minutes later, the exact same thing happened. It was nearly 8.30 then and I was already having extravagent rage and temper tantrum. I wanted to flag a cab down real bad but even then, I still thought about how great of a relationship the bus and I have had over the years and I was just confused, why? Why? Although my heart had been bruised, I convinced myself that there must have been an explanation, so I allowed myself to believe in it once again. Sometime after 8.30, finally the bus and I made up. It apologized and I forgave. So it took me to school, but it was too late and I missed my quiz, but at least we got back together again and what doesn't kill you just makes you stronger.

Now, just forget everything that I said in the last 5 minutes, okay?

Great, now I feel better. I just slept for nearly 12 hours and it was the best sleep in days. For once, I didn't wake up with massive headache and hallucination. Science says you can't have lack of sleep and just make up for it in weekend, meaning I can't have four hours of sleep on weekdays and twelve hours on weekend to compensate for it because our bodies don't work like that, so if one day I suddenly collapsed or anything, at least you would know why and not be too surprised. "Ah, I've seen it coming, that girl has been abusing her body by making it work OTT everyday and not even giving it salary." But don't you know that our brain is most active when we're asleep? Our body is resting but the brain is the complete opposite, I think that's why I constantly have this excessive imagination and dramatic over-the-top ideas. Because I simply sleep too much. Hmm, I don't know how I feel about that. I guess that's a good thing? Hmm?

Aside from the getting-tired part, in a way I feel good because I start making my time useful and I actually do something other than partying and getting wasted, hey, speaking of partying......

I'm kidding. This last week has been very productive and I wrote more (although not here), that is, assignments and writing sample. And I actually reviewed things that have been taught in class at night (impressive, although the reason behind it is because of quiz, not because I have conscience) but the bottom line is the same, no?

The interview yesterday was fine, it wasn't a complete disaster like the other one, but again there were still things I wished I didn't say, ("Well, I take pictures just for fun because I'm very narcissistic, so no, I can't say I know photojournalism.." and "I like Sex and the City because of the obvious? The sex part?" just to mention two, believe me, I wished my mouth has a censor-board), but well the boss seemed not so appaled so who knows. He asked whether I had facebook all while clicking and tapping away in his laptop, I had a hunch he searched into my profile hoping to know more about my real personality. (Shit, all my partying pictures.......) On the bright side, yesterday I was simply too tired to care about my answer, I was definitely sleepy and I started seeing stars halfway through the cab journey to the office, but thanks to the damn talkative taxi driver, I managed to keep my eyes open with all the strength I could muster, so I was just happy to get it over with. No time to get nervous, once the boss settled me into his small office, I was talking and nodding (hopefully) all in the right places while struggling not to yawn. So I said it went well.

The trip back home was another story. Guilty for wasting too much money on cab lately, I decided to walk and took train instead. It was quite a distance from the office to the train station so I was already panting pathetically then. On top of that, I was wearing heels, and the sun was blazing it could set eggs to fry. I didn't feel sleepy anymore, yipee. The yawn has miraculously dissapeared and replaced by sweat and unglam face. I chose yawn everytime. Damn it. Took the train afterwards from Tanjong Pagar (which was where the office is) and alighted at Chinese Garden just to walk again to the flat. I swear it was the hottest day ever, and for once it wasn't because of me. (Ha!) My feet were killing me, my bag was so heavy (I went to the interview straight from school and you should see how thick my textbook is...And yes, why the hell is there school on a Saturday?!) I almost lost the feeling of my shoulder, and the heat was enough to set my temper right to boiling point. I was mad!

Nearing the apartment just when I was about to cross the street, some guy approached me. I looked at him deadly because he obviously kept me from my soon-anticipated-nap-of-the-year.

The-Guy-Who-Would-Have-Been-Sidekicked-If-This-Was-My-Dream: "Hi, excuse me.."
Me: "What?!"
The-Guy-Who-Was-Obviously-Slow-In-Brain-Department: "Um..Do you know.."
Me: "What?????!!!"
The-Guy-Who-Was-Apparently-Also-Slow-In-Language-Department: "Do you know where the nearest post office is?"
Me: "No."
The-Guy-Who-Had-Problem-With-His-Ear: "......."
Me: "No, I'm sorry, I don't know."
The-Guy-Who-Should've-Known-Better: "You don't?"
Me: (losing patience) "I. Don't."
The-Guy-Who-Should've-Shutted-Up-and-Walk-Away: "But don't you live around here?"

Seriously. What am I, a damn street directory? Mayor of the Town? A freaking postman?! Besides, what was his point anyway? I already told him I did not know, why should he go on and make an accuse as if I'm a bad citizen for not knowing where the post office was?!

Gee, if I was in another mood I probably would have helped him look for the pos office, all while holding hands and skipping, but I was in no mood of such. By then I was sure I must have had blisters all over my feet and looked like a zombie. Okay, I surely didn't make myself look appealing. But as you can already tell, I'm not a big fan of sweating and it makes me grumpy.

Yeah. I think I've described it pretty well. Far more than you wished to know. Or care.

Friday night, the previous day of the 'grumpy ol' me-scenario, which probably would explain why I was so sleepy. We were having late dinner (better known as supper) at Clarke Quay but something was missing: my energy, oohh where art you? I need some good old trashy shameless fun party. -__-'

And just for making this entry a bit more longer than necessary, we were chillin' at Starbucks where we occupied the best seats of all - the big couch nearest to the door overlooking the street, if you picture the Starbucks near Heeren (opposite Meritus Hotel) you would know what I mean.

Feeling quite 'super' that day. Because my class ends at 12.30 everyday, I feel like I have the entire day to do whatever, now I know why time usually feels so fast (yeah, because I wake up at 1 in the afternoon? Half of the day basically has passed while I'm sinking myself to further pig-doom.)

So long story short..(short? Are you kidding me?) I'm now enjoying a good old sleep, finally. Not now, technically I'm wide awake now, but I mean today. Tomorrow's another hard working day and I'm counting my 'lover' to not let me down. Speaking of tomorrow,..I have a paper I have yet to make, but I'm seeing Atonement this evening so I'm quite excited. Until next time?;)

Friday, 25 January 2008

News Flash

Okay, just a short post to let you know that I'm still here, not yet abducted by alien, unfortunately, sorry to dissapoint you. I'm just really busy with school these days, and it doesn't help that my classes are all in the morning. By the end of the lesson, I would have always been either: (1)halfy asleep, (2)halfly hallucinating or (3)halfly sleepwalking.

One time I only had two hours of sleep and I swear I couldn't remember waking up, taking a bath, alighting the bus, sitting for lecture, and going back home. All I remembered was being safely back in my room and sleeping for as long as this body's still warm. I think I was sleepwalking throughout the day.

But I'm young, I should have had more more energy than this, apparently my 'energy' has fleed somewhere to watch concert or whatever else, cos everyday I just feel the same fatigue and tiredness and I'm so ashamed to admit it!

Although school takes up quite some amount of time (with all the quizes everyday, homeworks, reading material, etc), but it isn't the only thing. I'm on the lookout for jobs and I've been in one interview yesterday (disastrous!) and another one tomorrow, I'm in the process of writing an article sample, and a whole lots of craps. I'm not feeling so good lately about some things lately.

So, yeah. I hope I can write more once this module is done. Until then, peace.

Sunday, 20 January 2008


Tomorrow I'm starting school...after months of brain absence. I feel so dumb you wouldn't believe it, my friend asked me what 9 times 2 is and I had to pause for a millisecond to answer. Now I'm officially freaked out. My intelligence is one thing I always boost about whenever opportunity arises.

Friend: Hey, isn't that our old friend from high school?
Me: Yes! I used to be a science student in high school!

Friend: Do you know what (this word) means?
Me: Yes, do you know I won speech competition back in high school?!

Friend: She looks so beautiful, don't you think?
Me: Maybe. Hey, I used to teach all my friends chemistry, math, biology, english!

Friend: How much is my change? (talking to herself, rather than to me)
Me: I'm very good with number. I was in science! Science! Science! Me! Yes, me!

I have to revert everything back to how intelligent I was, and still am! I won't let a silence go by without making that statement and hoping that it would make me look even brighter, sometimes I would even cut my friend's sentence...

Friend: Have you seen my b.....??
Me: (cutting her words) IwasasciencestudentandIwasinyearbookdesigncommitteandallteachersadoredme......!!! (in one long breath)

After that, my friend just looked me weirdly and she has never asked me out again ever since. I always thought she was just intimidated by my *what else, intelligence*, but come to think of it, maybe she just thought I was a loser beyond belief.

So imagine my horror when I couldn't even answer 9 times 2 under one second! This lack of brain's activity is scaring me way more than watching Ju-On and I was almost pissing myself then. I guess it's a good thing, then, that school starts tomorrow. And moreover, in the spirit of becoming a more responsible adult, I won't complain at how early I have to wake up every morning, at how irritating it can be waiting for a crowded bus, standing and being squeezed by people all the way to school, at how sweaty and hot the weather is after the lesson ends in midday...

Nope, as a maturing woman, you won't hear me mutter a single word of complaint about any of it.

On a lighter note! I just saw '27 Dresses' today and it was great! James Marsden is so ogle-able in it (is there such word?), I have always thought he's a cutie but in this movie, everything about him just feels right! In Enchanted, his hair is way too long, in X-Men, his eyes are constantly covered, and to me eyes are important! What else? In Hairspray, well, there is just simply too much hairgel..but he's definitely a catch in this one. Okay, past the James Marsden effect, the story is good and funny without being too dramatic.

Yesterday I went to Chinatown and had dinner at this sort of food court at Bukit Timah. I was craving for cockles and boy, didn't I get cockles. Look at that!

Fresh yummy cockles....cheese mushroom prata...and teh tarik. Okay, odd combination.

F had this fried cockles kway-tew and I have my eyes set on it for next time, hahaha!

Friday, 18 January 2008

Ramblings. What's New?

I have nothing to blog about these days, people. I'm young and alive (!!!) and the only interesting thing I can tell you is, that I have just been 'busy' in front of my pc trying to make sense of this facebook thingy, and dare I say it, failing miserably. What happened to Friendster? Why does everyone bug me to join facebook where I have to again, write introductionary profiles and 'about me' noone has ever read anyway, post pictures noone would ever pay attention to more than once, add yet another contacts and friends whom I already have in my Friendster account to begin with? God forbids, some 500 plus of them, to be exact?

But I'm not complaining, thanks to this thing, I actually have something to do! And I'm ashamed to admit it, but so far I'm not doing that good. See, I wrote in my own wall, I setted up all these applications which purposes were apparently lost on me, and my profile at the moment looks like I (a) have no social life, (b) have no friends, (c) am simply pathetic.

Aside from being so retardedly-challenged in technology department, I am doing good. I'm not such a mess anymore (like when I wrote that stupid emotional whatever I posted before), and I'm climbing straight up to 'okayness'. I'll be fine, I'm sure of that. They say time is the best healer, well, in this case, facebook helps a little too. At least it keeps my mind off things.

But I honestly haven't been doing much as I should have. You know, I have yet rise up to star-dom, so what is there to tell? Me going to library a few days ago? Yeah, right, you would have rather shoot yourself before you actually pretended to be interested. I should be insulted, but I wouldn't inflict that upon myself, let alone you.

So instead, I would just say something real quick. Why is it, that most of the time, people worry about you more than you worry about yourself? Me, personally. I'm someone who absolutely has no sense of danger. When I got really sick, I would think of it as just a temporary cold which would pass immediately. When a guy got me alone in a room, I would say that he just wanted to talk, or recite poems. When I bled, I would shrug it off. Do I make sense? It's like, people around me are a lot more concerned about my well-being and my safety more than I can say for myself. And it's not like I don't care, or that I consciously look for danger, but I think I have always belittled things, you know. The weird thing is, I only do that to myself. Why do I feel as if I'm invisible to danger? I mean, do I have to be raped first before I realize that I shouldn't be alone in a room with guys I barely know? You see, that's just the extreme example. Back home, I got this awful red eye for weeks, and it was only after a while that I had the initiative to go to the doctor to get it checked. And he told me I got an infection, which should be quite serious if it was left untreated. He gave me some eyedrops and asked me go back to him after a week. Did I go back there after a week? Bummer, no. My dad was crazy about it, he kept scolding me but I never got around to it. In the end, fortunately, everything is okay now but it could just easily be not okay. The virus could possibly still be there, looming in my eyes, waiting for the time to hatch again (ew!) but even I can't understand why couldn't I just go to the doctor and get it over with, for good. I don't know. But not having a sense of danger is dangerous, man.

Ah. I just got my result for my philosophy subject. You remember that? All the discussion on Aristotle, Plato, Ethics of happiness, Utilitarian, John Stuart Mill, Archaic culture? Well, okay, you got the point. I did the final assignment back home, and I remembered talking to my friend a few days ago about it, he said the teacher only wanted like, 12 pages max, and he wanted it in double-spacing, although beats me, how did I not know that? I was in the class too, wasn't I? Then why did I write some 27-pages-narcissistic-piece on 'the world according to me' and in single spacing, some more? I was so convinced I would get a C or something. No teacher would wanna read some ramblings from a student when he already told the class he only wanted twelve-pages-paper, although the student could defend herself that she absolutely had no idea about it. It's because all you did in my class is talk, talk, talk, and talk!

Which I don't think is true. I think I made a very good student, despite my coming to class late a few times, and cutting the second half of lecture once in every blue moon. Bollocks!

Considering all those aspects, I guess it's a good thing I had an A-minus. Although, what is the minus for? It's like, the paper is so brilliant, but the teacher was having a bad day when he marked it, so 'ah, let me add a MINUS in it because I'm not feeling so gorgeous today...'

Wednesday, 16 January 2008

"Apparently Unaffected"

You were the one that got me
One who cheered me up in moody days
Kept me grounded when I'm insane
And the one who laughed at my slurry jokes
Despite my imperfectness, you made me feel
Like I was enough

Where did we go wrong
When did time finally take its toll
How did things get this bad
Who decided to let go
And said that this is the end

I'm sorry
For I'm not apparently unaffected
But let everything comes out in the open
Because I'm not apparently unaffected

Against my better judgment I trusted you
Now I realized it was a foolish move
Because to you, words don't mean a thing
And promises are too soon forgotten

But there is no reason to be cruel
You could have just shutted up
Instead of making empty promises
I would have rather heard nothing at all

But I hate myself
For not being apparently unaffected
And for letting you see the weaker side of me
Because I'm not apparently unaffected

I come to realize that I misread your moods
And expectations
I wasn't blithely aware of you unspoken wants
You still have yet to explore

So just go away and leave me alone
Because I will be okay
You will have to live with yourself
Knowing that you've spent your life telling lies

So I keep on breathing
Because you are not the air
So I keep on walking
Because nothing's worth looking back for

And I'm done with waiting
For life is simply too short
And I'm done with running
For there's nothing worth fighting for

I had my moments of shame
Unfortunate and inevitable regrets
My share times of clueless fumblings
But I'm not the one losing pride

At the end of the day your true colors are shown
Your real face is rippling to the surface
And I learn my lesson
For I need to be apparently unaffected

To you, for making me stronger
To you, to the one that got away
And for no looking back.

Tuesday, 15 January 2008

Getting in Touch with Mother Nature?

So, I actually got around to make it to the Botanical Garden yesterday, and whereas you won't see me stopping in the middle of the street just to admire blossoming leaves and analysing whether they are monocotile or dicotile (people don't actually do that, do they?), I really enjoyed the trip itself. Okay, using the word 'trip' seems like the garden is hundred kilometres away and we had to dive, cycle, crawl, run, row, and try not to kill ourselves in the process just to get there. To be fair, let me say that the garden is just near Orchard, okay.

See? Now you don't seem so interested anymore. I knew I should have gone for dramatic effect. Bugger.

On the hind side, our little tiny outing didn't exactly run smoothy as we hoped for. Well, just between you and me, I was hoping for a sunny day with a side of cloudy so it wouldn't get too hot and I wouldn't die perspiring or worse, looking beyond awful (I need to get my priorities sorted out). And I don't know, maybe if I would encounter some exotic looking animals, I would sing and the birds would follow me and dance along, and the day would involve some rainbows and beautiful sunset.

Was it really too much to ask, you think?

Never mind, I knew you wouldn't understand. A girl has to have an active imagination, okay. So anyway, where was I? Ah yes, there's a good reason why we looked like we just got slimed in the picture. No, we weren't swimming in the lake with bunch of swans, neither were we fighting over who got to feed the fish and ending up pushing each other to the water, we are civilised human beings, if not anything. What happened was, the rain ruined it all. Yes, just soon after I mentioned 'I love the weather today, it's a bit cloudy so I'm not sweating, see? I wish everyday could be more like this', the thunders stroke and I swear I heard someone laugh as if say, 'you like this weather? I GIVE you real weather!' C'mon, are you kidding me? I completely just jinxed it! Bloody hell!

By that time we were just going in the garden and it's called garden for a reason, meaning it's outdoor, okay! Once it's raining, you basically just...get stuck. And that's how we started this-so-called-rainbows-sunset-trip. We were trapped in a little bungalow and the rain was just crazy beyond belief and oh, the wind! Half an hour later, we were soaked in water, we were shivering, and we were cursing. Okay, he didn't curse, I did. He just kept apologizing, for what, I'm not sure.

Luckily (yes, it could only get better, no?), eventually the rain subsided, leaving only drizzle and it was at least safe to walk again, You know, safe from being stroke by the lighting? Safe from getting blown away by the wind?

So off we went, and there's the map of the garden, pretty big, huh? The entrance was at the far end of the left and we managed to walk all the way round the path.

The thing about going just the two of us again? Just a little bit troublesome to take pictures! So far we've encountered strangers who just couldn't count 1,2,3, those who stood so far away you'd think we're epidemic or something, those whose hands seemed to be catching parkinsons out of a sudden, those who looked suspicious they might rob my camera, well. Thank goodness for them or these pictures wouldn't be here.

So, that's the National Orchird Garden, which we had to pay to get in. At that time, we didn't know how much it cost so we just didn't bother. Later on, we found out that for students actually it was just one buck. Bloody hell again.

It was taken at the 'Shaw Foundation Symphony Stage'. Word has it that they held music perfomances here sometimes, that could be interesting although I never seemed to have heard anything about it.


There's bound to be some flowers, right? I did not pick it out okay, I'm Miss. Environment now.

We found this funny-looking huppah. I told him how people usually got married right in the middle of it. Oh, bless the tripod and the 10-seconds-timer shot!

This 'evolution garden' was quite interesting, there were years-mark right on the road every some hundred metres or so to chronologically resemble how the earth looked like according to the year. So for instance, it was, say, 400 million years ago, then there would be stonehenges, volcanoes and ancient-looking rocks.

...or something like this.

..and this.

The year went way up to 'present day', and by then we would have been back to the original route so we could continue our walk forward.

Admiring the purplish blossoming flowers.

He said during weekends when the weather is actually being friendly to manhood, people just come here to sit on the grass and have picnic, read books, chill, whatever. Wow, that is great. I think my memory of actually being in a garden and sit by the grass was when I was so small when my family went to the Bogor Botanical Garden and I would just run around wildly. Mom then would call up our names and we would sit on the mat to eat our lunches along with so many other families doing exactly the same all around us. I haven't thought about it for the longest time. I miss that.

So this might not be an exotic animal, but there's something about swans! This is actually really great, cos the swan was initially up far away in the lake and we just came closer to get better look at it. Suddenly it swam right up to us, made a calling sound and another swam approached us too! They actually walked to us from the pond to the land and they just came so close to us that I had to run back a little. Hey, swans are not carnivores, right? Ha!

Look at that, it was initially that far!

...and suddenly there were two! And they were literally marching right up to us. Oh wow, I think that's the higlight of the day.

They were walking around for a while in the land while I was too busy being amazed, and they went back up to the lake and swam away together.

I was saying this to my friend, "where are the white swans? They would look so prettier in the picture!" and he called me 'swan-ist' if there is such word! Hey, just to make things clear, I have no problem with black swans, okay!

..the closest we could get to a real sunset. Oh well, the rainbow will have to wait.

So the night fell. We were tired for walking and we found this on the way back. Something magical about the water, even though it might have just been the lights.

Aside from having exhausting ourselves, we were hungry. Personally I could eat an entire cow myself!

We had our dinner at Holland Village (and this time we actually made it!) and because I don't see any 'a whole cow' up in the menu, I settled for cheese prata! There weren't that many choices there but I loved the cheese nevertheless.

And here's to a day, which could have been better, but could have been a lot worse, so...ah sod it! It's a great day!

Sunday, 13 January 2008

You and A Trip Gone Wrong.

I know it's probably not healthy to be pissed off at this time of the day. After all, it's still 3 in the afternoon, and they say you're not allowed to get drunk before midnight. Well, at least when you're drunk, you have the excuse not to behave like yourself, and people forgive you for it.

I have all this anger towards you. Anger is probably not the right word, what, then? Dissapointment? Confusion? No, wait, make it anger too.

I'm a big girl, I'll be okay, whatever it is you're afraid to tell me. I don't know, the least you can do is have the decency to talk to me. What, you have the balls to f***ing start things with me and not end it? I know it seems impossible for us, and I'm not a fairy-tale dreamer either. I'll be okay. I'll probably be sad for some time but everyone's bound to feel sad at one point or another. I don't believe that you're only trying to guard me.

I would much rather know everyhing now. It doesn't matter what you're going to say as long as you promise you will be nothing but truthful. Isn't it funny, that I believed in you before, but not now, even though we're supposed to be a lot closer? Where's the logic in that? I think I deserve that, at the very least. Your honesty to set things clear. I just need you to know one thing, that I will really be okay.

I just need to get it off my chest.

As for what's going on with me, not much, actually. School won't start until the end of this month so I have quite a handful of time before then. I'm trying to write and read more (I know I've been reading this Sidney Sheldon book for some time and I'm embarrassed to admit that I'm still yet to finish it! But it's thick and the font is not exactly too friendly for my non-superhuman eyes, okay.) and between times, I'm trying to catch up more with friends and spend time with my sister before she starts working. Apparently by then, she will have been too cool to go out with me, different prestige level, she said. Haha, I'm kidding. She will just be super busy so I need to resort to friends and books to mend my lonely heart.

What else, just two days ago I had a really stupid experience. Okay, I might not known for my talent in 'navigating myself', let alone someone else. But I didn't even realize my mistake right until it's already done, and I have never felt any stupider than that. See, my friend and I were at Orchard after our dinner time, and we were set to go to Holland Village afterwards, the problem was, neither of us knew quite right as which bus to take, but as if that has ever stopped us. (okay, there was that time when we wanted to go to Dempsey Road and we were completely oblivious - but we were smart enough then to just resort to taxi!) Who did we think we were? Feminime version of Indiana Jones, the great adventurer? Ben Gates from National Treasure who dedicated himself to exploring new places and trying not to get killed in between?

But I mean, how difficult could it be, finding a bus from Orchard to Holland Village? I mean, Holland Village is not Timbuktu or anything. Countless buses go there, and Orchard is not Ethiopia either. So we took 123 bus after consulting the bus directory and boy, were we confident. The damn bus didn't come until almost half an hour later, and that was already good thirty minutes of our lives which we would never get back! (exclamation mark!) But fine, since my friend has been talking about how good the cockles were in one of the hawker at Holland V, I beared with it. The thought of cockles were what kept me going! Okay, I know I should've said, 'the lively ambience', or 'the numerous bars', but the cockles were all it's all about.

So finally we were settled in a chilly bus which its air-con was set in intention to turn all of its passengers into ice cubes, which then could be used to replace the melting ice in the Artic. Seriously, who sets the temperature?! The bus went on, and on, and on, and on, and it took us another 30 minutes to finally question where the hell we were. By that time, most passengers have alighted, leaving us with only one-other-probably-lost-too-woman. It was dark outside, and trees were everywhere and I felt like I was on the set of The Jungle Book. The street sign then revealed 'Bt.Permai' and we exchanged blank glances, it might as well show 'You-Stupid-Avenue' or 'Directional Retarded Road' and it wouldn't make any difference since we have never heard a place called Bt Permai in our entire lives.

What happened after was, it wasn't clear whether we just simply have missed our stops in Holland V, or whether we took the wrong bus route to begin with. Either way, we have wasted another hour of our brilliant lives which now didn't feel half as brilliant anymore. What gutted us more was that, we found out that the bus was going to go back to Orchard! Exactly to the same place we were! The exact bus stop which we waited thirty minutes at! If we weren't too busy cursing our own stupidity, we would have been already laughing our asses off.

On the way back to Orchard, though, we passed Clarke Quay and so I just suddenly snapped, 'let's just hop down here. It seems like a smarter move than just go back to where we first started..' And so there you go, the story on how we ended up at Clarke Quay on Friday night and on the time in chronological details when I had to kiss the cockles goodbye.

I'm glad we went there, though! Cockles aside, (what IS with me and cockles? Geez!) Clarke Quay's still a great place to hang out. There's just so much energy.

Ordered this mocktail (forgot the name), but it was too sour for my taste. The thing about going out just the two of us, it was rather troublesom to take pics cos we had to constantly ask for passers-by and waitresses' help.

So at least by the end of the night we didn't curse as much anymore, and we accepted the fact that we were directionally challenged people, and one lesson we learnt the hard way: when in doubt, just hail a cab!

No, seriously. I felt so embarrassed. It's not my fault my brain's made of by cells oblivious of the word 'map', 'navigation', 'streets', and 'avenues'. That must have been our first lousiest moments in 2008, and it's not even a month yet.

Compared to that incident, my yesterday's trip with Sis to Kallang seemed like a monumental achievement, although at a point we were struggling to find the right bus stop from the station to take us to the Leisure Park, but at least it didn't cost us our youth! An hour of my youth, don't remind me. Can you see my wrinkles already?

Saturday, 12 January 2008

Doctor's Order

"See, you got yourself what it's called the narcissistic personality disorder..The symptoms of narcissistic personality disorder revolve around a pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, and sense of entitlement. Often individuals feel overly important and will exaggerate.....let's discuss this over the steak....You can tell me all about your worries while I eat.."

We Are So Bright

In heated and passionate discussion over crab, mussels and squids..

Me: "Sis, do you know that Hilary Clinton won 40% of the US Presidential candidate in the beginning of this year?"

Sis: "Ah, yes, I read about it, Barack Obama was the second, right?"

Me: "Yes! 32%! How close!"

Sis: "How exciting!"

Me: "We're suckers for American politics!"

Sis: "Ah yes..oh..and you know that John McCain....that Republican..."

Me: "Oh and that..the actual president will only be selected on the 20th January next year.."

Sis: "Wow..magic.."

And this is how we had our lunch.

Thursday, 10 January 2008

Sleeping...Supposed to Rest Your Body? Well, Think Again.

By now, you should have known about my two little brothers who have just redefined the terms 'oh,i'm-just-too-cool-for-camera-my-face-is-worth-a-thousand-pounds-I-only-want-to-get-my-picture-taken-by-professional-photographers-not-by-these-amateurs-I-wouldn't-be-caught-dead-with-an-actual-expression-on-my-face!' And okay, sometimes I can be a bit overbearing with the camera, but my point is, you've seen them when they're awake. And they could put Mr. Subzero himself to shame.

But you haven't seen anything yet before you get your hands on these.

Eeeeeerrrrrghh!! I feel something! Is that someone pressing down my body???!! You shall pay!

10 minutes later..

I'm the Kungfu master, ciaaaaaaattttt!! I will kick whoever who dares ruin my goodnight sleep! Now, feel this, my notorious Tsunami Kick, which should be performed with my eyes closed and my arms scretched out like this! Haiiiiaaaaa! Bukkk! Bukk! Bukkk!!

Good. So you've learnt your lesson. Go away from me. As long as you don't mess with me, I won't pick a fight. Now you've tasted my powerful Tsunami Kick, you won't dare go near me again. I see you've turned away, good choice. I shall practice my zen-meditation now. My legs bent like this, yes, and my eyes are to remained close at all times!

Aaaahhh!! Okay okay, I'm sorrrryyy!! I wasn't aware before that you're Tai-chi level twelve Master! Okay I'll behave! And your Tsunami Kick is definitely deadlier! I admit defeat!

Mwahahaha! Go away! This is my bed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Excuse me???? Hello??? Actually, it is my bed! I should have slept in the other half of the bed while you continued hassling each other. Seriously, it was like watching a comedy. Night entertainment for free. Priceless.

If they're quite a handful when they're fully awake, then they're....two hands plus two legs plus one nose one mouth two eyes two ears-full when they're sleeping! Which is a lot worse!

Wednesday, 9 January 2008

Mad About John - an Article, Attempt #1

John Cusack was born on June 28, 1966 in Evanston, a northern district of Chicago. His father, Richard, worked in an advertising agency but later found out that he wasn’t satisfied with it. In 1970, he strived for a more substantial life, forming a production company and moving into documentary film-making. Mother, Nancy was a school-teacher-turned-a-full-time-mother to her five children, Ann, Joan, Bill, John, and Susie.

Life at the Cusack household was nowhere near ordinary, to say the least. Soon enough it became clear that the five siblings were so into the world of acting. They would imitate scenes from movies; so much that John described his childhood as ‘one continuous performance’. But he wasn’t just talking. By the age of 8 he enrolled in Piven Theatre Workshop, run by family friends, Byrne and Joyce Piven, together with his sisters, Ann and Joan, and Jeremy, the Piven’s son, who would later be John’s lifelong friend.

John confessed hating his time at Evanston Township High School because he felt like an outsider, but he kept himself busy – watching European films, American classics, black-and-white-flicks, anything, determined to learn everything there is to know about this fast-growing fascination and passion of his. By the time he was 12, he already got a lot on his belt, doing radio spots acting and commercial voice-overs. At 14, John had starred in many stage productions and was already known as ‘a brilliant and generous improviser’.

During the ‘80s, John played in more other movies, including “Class”, “Sixteen Candles”, “Better Off Dead”, “The Sure Thing”, and “The Journey of Natty Gann”. These movies did little to John’s big movie stardom status, but like he cared. By this time, John was even more determined to pursue career in film and he gulped each and every movie experience with passion and dedication like a sponge. Filming “The Sure Thing” introduced John to co-star Tim Robbins, who is a big influence on his career and attitude. Robbins inspired him to form New Crime Theatre in his hometown with childhood friend, Jeremy Piven, where he began directing plays.

At early twenties, Cusack was already mature and experienced, he surely knew what he wanted and a lot of times he turned down good movie offers, which seemed foolish, but hey, the guy had his own standards. Then came “Say Anything”, his probably-most memorable and biggest role yet. He played Llyod Dobler, who he later admitted as being so much alike as him. John’s performance in ‘Say Anything’ proved that he could carry a leading role, portraying a hopeless-loser and made him very charmingly likeable. Suddenly Cusack was an unlikely sex-symbol.

But John didn’t intend to be a sex-symbol, or the object of females’ obsession. Or even a celebrity. He’d always hated the pretentious world of Hollywood, but realized that he had to go there to make movies. What he wanted was to be a serious actor with complex roles. We got to admire him for that.

And so the ‘90s marks beginning of John’s journey in more versatile and grown-up roles. He also wrote a comedy-thriller script called “Grosse Pointe Blank”, which was turned into a movie by Disney. “High Fidelity”, his other memorable role, allowed him to star, as well as co-produced and wrote the scores. (He did not disappoint. I’ve seen it.)

If we were to mention all of John’s works and achievements, it will be a very long list. By 2006, he already had almost 50 movies under his belt and there is no sign of him stopping, or even taking a breath. Cusack has a mind of his own, one that is probably not understood by all; his continuing loathing for celebrities, his love for literature and passion for film-making. He will not for a second feel down if his movie fails to hit the blockbuster, that’s for sure. We are bound to respect him, it’s hard not to. Well, and the fact that he's an active humanitarian probably makes it almost impossible, even.

John Cusack has gone a long way. From his early childhood at a small town in Chicago with five siblings and determined parents, to a well-rounded, passionate, unique and brilliant artist who knows what he wants, is not afraid to fail and dares to be different.

Where does he go on from now, you ask? Continue what he does best. Acting? Writing? Directing? Hating the superficiality of Holywood? You choose. I can’t decide.

"The more you expose yourself as a celebrity, the less interesting you are to watch in your work, because if you're putting yourself out there all the time, you're not holding anything back."

Toshiba is the New Laptop

When you were told you could make any purchase in 15 minutes time, you would probably think of buying a new toothpaste, or stocking milk for home. Or, say you were to splurge a lot amount of money, you would say 'shut up you bloody nuisance! I need as much time in the world to decide which shoes to buy, it's afterall a 600 bucks worth of real money!' to anyone who kept telling you to hassle.

So what if I told you that I bought a new laptop today when the sun was still high on one-go under fifteen minutes of contemplating?

You probably would share my dear friend's reaction on this.

Me: I bought Toshiba hahaha. I feel so poor now haha.
Him: What? Why? When? Where? How? My gosh! Which model?! Tina! R u crazy? Faint..

I think the fainting part is so hilarious.

So, anyway. It's not like it's a spontaneous purchase, it's not like I was out there in the mall where laptops' exhibitions were taking place and suddenly I just got strucked by lightning and I thought to myself, "Gee, how nice it would be to own a brand new laptop" and five minutes later, walked out from the store and was at least 1000 bucks poorer.

At least I wasn't like that! I have been wanting a new laptop for a while cos my current one is below useable and sometimes it would just shut down on its own. Is it trying to go berserk and betray me?! I've been taking such good care of you and this is how you repay me, you ungrateful piece of gadget?! I might not scrub your screen everyday, I might not do some disk clean-up for years, I might not even provide you with anti-virus sometimes, but I do love you! I think of you every night before I go to sleep and I can't live a day without you! Your keypads might be rusty, some parts of your body might be missing, and your battery might not be inspirational for your kinds anytime soon, but I still constantly change your wallpaper and I always upgrade my pictures in you regularly. So there is no reason to throw temper tantrum on me, is there?

Unless, you are simply too old for me. Your many years of life experience just doesn't impress me anymore and the parts in you which I initially thought sexy just isn't any longer, but it's not your fault. It's just, your youth has already passed you by and that left me with no choice but to replace you with someone younger and newer. Please don't hold this against me. I promise I won't destroy you, I will just sell you. Some of your components might still be used to create another computer and isn't that just very beautiful? You will be regenerated, you will be united with nature. That is the greatest gift anyone can ever give because destroying you will be useless and is against the environment, and you know best that I am nothing but environmentally friendly.


Where was I? Ah yes, about the motives behind the purchase. Yes, it wasn't such an impulse purchase because it's laptop, not some cleaning-liquid to scrub your toilet bowl. But I thought I would need more time to decide and browse around to look for alternatives and options. I honestly haven't looked at anything quite yet. I just needed a new laptop but I haven't actually done anything on that behalf like any other normal human being would, such as 1)going to SimLim or Funan to check prices, 2)log in some websites to look for models and build some preferences, or at least I should have 3)call my dad and tell him that I'm going to buy a new laptop as! Or 4)do anything at all! The fact that I could just go out there and go home with a brand new laptop which just took about 15 minutes to ask for enquiries, compare prices, compare models, decide and purchase is somewhat an achievement in itself. Or was I just crazy like my friend said?

No, I'd like to think it's deeply impressive. And bold. With just a side of crazy. A little bit.

I just think it would confuse me more if I look at more options in more places, don't you think? Besides, this one right here is great enough, and the price is just suitable. It's not like I need it to create a new rocket or something. I just need it for daily use, considering that I'm somewhat rather technology-challenged myself. If I were given the newest laptop with the most advanced features, I would still only use it for the Microsoft Office and MSN and look at a waste I'd be making. Ha!

It's Toshiba, by the way. And I wished it could come in white or red, but nope, it's standard boring black. Good thing it's glossy. It's great that it's glossy. Sorry, don't mean to insult you, my dear old laptop. But you ought to go to the left, to the left, or so Beyonce said.

Since it's Windows Vista, I ought to get some getting used to, but it's not that much different, really. And the RAM is so fast, it took me more than an hour just to copy the contents of my old laptop to a drive until I practically fell asleep waiting for it, and my sister had to wake me up, otherwise the damn thing would be running all night, but pasting it here to the new one is as fast as peeing itself.
Anyway, my damn camera is so failing me. Since Sis just bought a new phone herself, with a five-megapixels camera, that is, I'll ask her to take properly good picture of my new baby here, haha. 'TIl then!

Monday, 7 January 2008

Last Day

Tonight my cousins are going back home and as much as I'm relieved (because I am exhausted too from keeping an eye on them 24/7), there's a sense of dread too that yeah, this is it, it's time everything goes back to normal and I have to start being busy and making up for lost time, months that I let myself forget and let go of all the daily routines. I know I will be okay, but things always seem scarier than they actually do.

For one thing, I've been contacting my lecturer in regard of my missed exams and I have to take the make-up exams as soon as I can. As if I want to drag it any further. There's nothing I would love more than settle the unsettled and move on, and I'm not just talking about school. But there are a lot of things that are going on in my mind and they wouldn't just take a single day of sitting inside a classroom to settle, that's what I'm scared of.

But one thing I know is that I'm tired of playing games. Life's just too short to be spent wondering and guessing and I know I deserve no such thing so just talk to me. I'm a big girl, I can handle the truth. I wanna know where I stand. I wanna know if I can trust you again.

Sorry, been kinda unfocused today, it must be the weather.

On lighter note, what do you think about my new blog and multiply theme? I know it's real girly, huh? I personally love the multiply theme. The blogger one is simple and cute but it can still do better, I was browsing around and trying out stuffs yesterday, this would have to do for now.

And, remember my obsession about the samsung camera?

I may have to postpone that for now ('failure is a postponed success', and that is me telling you that the camera will be mine, eventually, someday, in the future, haha) but for now I need a new laptop. There are lots of promotions but the best one I've seen so far was this small Acer which costs only $990. Will have to still keep a lookout for others.

Gotta go take dearest double cous to airport now.

Saturday, 5 January 2008

A Day at Sentosa

We have survived to live for another day! Despite being dragged down, soaked wet, drenched cold, torn apart, and stomped hard by the mercilessly rain (and I'm exaggerating just a tiny winy bit), it was a fun day! The part about the rain was right, though, it was raining really hard this afternoon in the middle of our adventure in Sentosa and we were practically bathing in the water filled with dirt and I don't wanna know what else. No, really, I don't. It was traumatic enough.

I'm not complaining, really! It's would have been perfect if it hadn't been raining..fine, I'm complaining but this is just so typical! We actually planned to go to Sentosa yesterday but it was cloudy so we postponed it to today in fear of rain but of course! it ended up not raining yesterday and today, you ask? It just couldn't get any wetter than this! The universe might not revolve around us but I swear it feels damn like it sometimes!

We woke up at 8 because the movie was supposed to be at 11 and we were nothing but punctual! Hey, I am totally punctual, mind you. When we got there to Tiong Bahru, it was still too early and the ticketing office hasn't even opened yet so we settled for brunch at Long John first. Well, it's not like I'm a bad sister for just feeding them fast food but cousins have never heard of Long John right until today so they wanted to give it a try. We had the breakfast set: french toast, egg cheese, bacon and fish sandwiches. Respectively, not for me only! Geez! time! Snap some pictures inside the theater. I was once scolded for posing in front of a movie poster at Cinelasuire as if I was trying to steal a child or something. What, violation of copyright? If that's the case, then I'm deeply sorry personally to Alvin and The Chipmunks.

The Golden Compass was great, as expected. There were only a few people inside the theater so I could lift my legs up as I liked without being scrutinized for having smelly feet. Ha!

When we first got to Harbor Front it still looked promisingly sunny. We took cable car to Sentosa and enthusiastically bought tickets for the luge! Romi was so confident he could beat us all up but cockiness is dangerous, my dear! He hit the corner of the lane and his 'vehicle' fell to the side, following soon enough was an evil mocking laugh and shoutings,..really????! My voice seemed like a blade in the serenity of the park....*sound of cricket* What is wrong with the people?! It was supposed to be fun and noisy! Yet I was the only one yelling 'Romi!!!! You fell! You fell!! I win! I win! I win! I wiiiiiinnnnn!!!!!!!'

I was already in near euphoria right until I was reminded that I just beat a 12-year-old boy in a less than 3-minutes game. Afterwards I just felt embarrassed. At least I had my moments.

Dwiki manuveuring his luge in the finishe line.

Walking to the skytrain which would take us back up from the luge's finish area. As far as I know, he only has one facial expression. We called him Jay Chou. Duh.

A skytrain, a 4-D simulation and a whole lot of drenching and soaking in rain later, it was becoming all too clear that we wouldn't be able to go to the beach and do some kayaking as planned, and besides it was already almost dinner time so we took the cable car back and had fabulous dinner at Marche.

with Vivo as the background.

Big dinner.

So we all seemed happy but it's already 2 in the morning now and I can't be happier from looking at the boys sleeping peacefully! I'm beat, really, and tomorrow we have another sets of plan lining up so I'm hitting the sack soon. I've been having a really bad flu since three days ago so I need to grab a bite and take some medicine now.

Back Here

I swear, it was still June 2007 and before I knew it, it's 2008 already? What? I blinked and I breathed and time has somehow outran me and left me so far behind? So I might not be the most athletic person on the planet but this is just surreal.

Okay, past that time-travelling thing, I'm back in Singapore at the moment and it would have been pretty lonely and weird being here after spending almost half a year back home, away from all the convenience the maids and drivers have provided, away from the comfort of being taken care of, away from not worrying of skimping, well you get the point, pretty much away from all the pampering and princess-like-previledges, okay, okay, I'll stop now for real. But, two of my dearest little cousins are here for holiday so eventhough they can be quite a handful, well, two handfulls to be exact, they flawlessly managed to throw away all the negative things so I'm really grateful for them.

We spent the whole day taking them around today and now they're sleeping peacefully and that's the only time they ever shut up! So for now only, I am beyond grateful of my super comfortable bed!

Anyway, I've been trying to post pictures in my photo album and I just didn't have the patience! I wanted to post pictures which was taken during my stay in Jakarta so they are a lot, and I mean, a lot, of them but that's not the problem. Apparently the size of the pictures taken by the camera was so large it took the whole eternity and more just to upload them. Hey, if it's just an issue of the time but I'm sure it's actually in the process of uploading, then I can wait, or I can just turn the computer on while I'm doing something else which makes it not that unbearable. The thing is, sometimes the downloading process would just stop in the middle with no indication whatsoever!! I could have just waited 'til all my hair turns white and the only thing happening besides my youth flashes before my eyes, is the grass growing! By the time I was totally sure it wasn't moving, I had already wasted so much time on...on what? Yes! On absolutely nothing!

So I'm doing it little by little as much as my patience could hold. Yipee!

Anyway. We went to Suntec, Esplanade, Orchard, Clementi and Boonlay today, see, we're not wasting any time!

with Cous #1 while waiting for our prata. Geez, could he look more excited?

...and Cous #2 who's absolutely a doll.

Tomorrow's going to be an early day again cos we're going for a movie and then to Sentosa. It's gonna be great.

Ah, I absolutely love having my internet again;)