Boyhood

I scream in delight when I heard about this movie. It's no surprise that I'm a huge, huge fan of Richard Linklater and the "Before" trilogy; in fact they are my most favourite movies of all time.

I remember being younger and so in love with Before Sunrise and Before Sunset that I had to make sure I made the guys I was currently dating watch (and love) them too. Somehow I wanted them to share the same deep emotional thoughts and wavelength that made me love these movies so much.

(No wonder those relationship never lasted. Ha!)

The genre is so unique; it's whether you love it, or you hate it. You either would fall deeply in love with it (like me), or find it super boring and when you just don't appreciate this type of deep conversation and relate able characters and pure emotions without exaggerating, special effects, all those Hollywood blah. My friend J is one of them.

In fact, now he admitted of finding it so boring that he almost fell to his death while watching it, but maintained his composure because I threatened him he wanted to impress me (so he said now). I probably had scarred him for life.

Anyway, I'm getting off track now. Let's get back to the point: Boyhood. Yes, so this is Richard Linklater's new movie and if you have been living in cave, I'm sure you've heard a huge buzz around; this being the only movie who took a spam of 12 years to film. It has also won a lot of awards (Golden Globes recently) and nominated for Oscars for more, including Best Picture and Best Director!

I missed seeing it in the cinema here, but I got lucky because the film was on the in-flight entertainment on my flight to Brisbane en route to New Zealand! So I spent almost 3 hours just indulging in this cinematic pleasure that brought back so much feelings and happiness (really similar feelings I have whenever I watch Before trilogy.)

My quickie review? It's an honest, real representation of a boy growing up in a family when like, all families, it's not always paradise. They overcome struggles and tears (divorce, alcoholic abusive dad, bullying at school, etc) but importantly also share the good times and, more importantly, how they stay together as a family despite their shortcomings.

I love, love, Patricia Arquette and Ethan Hawke in this. They make it flawlessly real and I can really feel Patricia's character's struggles being a single mom and doing the things she does. I love her! And as for Ethan Hawke, he's brilliant as expected, not that I ever doubted it.

Some of my favourite conversation from the movie:

Mason: Dad, there's no real magic in the world, right?
Dad: What do you mean?
Mason: You know, like elves and stuff. People just made that up.
Dad: Oh, I don't know. I mean, what makes you think that elves are any more magical than something like a whale? You know what I mean? What if I told you a story about how underneath the ocean, there was this giant sea mammal that used sonar and sang songs and it was so big that its heart was the size of a car and you could crawl through the arteries? I mean, you'd think that was pretty magical, right?

Mom: [Mason is leaving for college] This is the worst day of my life.
Mason: What are you talking about?
Mom: [Starts crying] I knew this day was coming. I just... I didn't know you were going to be so fucking happy to be leaving.
Mason: I mean it's not that I'm that happy... what do you expect?
Mom: You know what I'm realising? My life is just going to go. Like that. This series of milestones. Getting married. Having kids. Getting divorced. The time that we thought you were dyslexic. When I taught you how to ride a bike. Getting divorced... again. Getting my masters degree. Finally getting the job I wanted. Sending Samantha off to college. Sending you off to college. You know what's next? Huh? It's my fucking funeral! Just go, and leave my picture!
Mason: Aren't you jumping ahead by, like, 40 years or something?
Mom: I just thought there would be more..

The pace of the movie is slow; I found myself enjoying the first part of the film more than the last half, but overall I really enjoyed this journey. It's amazing seeing Mason (the main boy's character) grow up and see how he transforms to a young man and I think that's what happens to us: we get confused, distracted, frustrated sometimes at our lives. We act out, rebel as a teenager, but his mom is such a strong figure in his life that no matter what live throws at him, I feel that his mom can always keep him grounded.

You care so much about this family because you literally grow up with them. And I think this is the point of this crazy idea of shooting over the spam of 12 years. Anybody who watches it would relate so much to this person and this family.

Overall, I would recommend everyone to watch this! There are a lot of things I love about this film, and I found myself smiling and crying with them, and I think that says a lot when a film can make you feel that way.

Wrong in Just The Right Way.

“We’re all seeking that special person who is right for us. But if you’ve been through enough relationships, you begin to suspect there’s no right person, just different flavors of wrong. Why is this? Because you yourself are wrong in some way, and you seek out partners who are wrong in some complementary way. But it takes a lot of living to grow fully into your own wrongness. And it isn’t until you finally run up against your deepest demons, your unsolvable problems—the ones that make you truly who you are—that we’re ready to find a lifelong mate. Only then do you finally know what you’re looking for. You’re looking for the wrong person. But not just any wrong person: the right wrong person—someone you lovingly gaze upon and think, “This is the problem I want to have.”

I will find that special person who is wrong for me in just the right way.

Let our scars fall in love.

Nostalgic..

I still feel like half my soul is left in New Zealand! Although I've just been back for 2 weeks, my travel bug is itching again and I found myself looking at travel packages to Hong Kong! (I think I really have a problem.)

Then again, work has been crazy and coming at me at full force. I know I said that this year will be the greatest year yet, but man, I'm going to have to earn every bit of that dollar. Ha! Okay, I'm supposed to blog about my New Zealand adventure, but I don't even know where to start.

Should I start at how terribly sick I got on the first day we reached Christchurch? Or maybe I should start describing how amazing and gorgeous New Zealand landscape and view is, and how I immediately got depressed that I probably wouldn't see that kind of view ever again. Or hey, maybe I can start writing about that breathtaking stargazing tour we had at Lake Tekapo, seeing Jupiter and the milky way and the most beautiful night sky full of stars that I have ever seen in one lifetime. Or the glow worm caves, or the zipline adventure in Queenstown, or the out-of-this-world Mount Cook and the glaciers at Franz Josef, or the horse riding journey along the lakes and mountains, feeling like Arwen in Lord of The Rings.. and I could go on forever.

But the sad thing is that nothing I would say could do any of it justice. Where's the blue lake and green mountains and bright blue sky?

Brb while I sob myself to sleep, dreaming of the gorgeous view of New Zealand..

It's a Hair-y Thing.

I suppose this year will be a year of change for me too! 

If I can be vain for a little while here, (deal with it, this is my blog!) my hair looks like it's the longest it has ever been, and I'm still deciding how to feel about that.

Hm, I've always thought having long hair is super troublesome, especially since I would need more time to wash and dry my hair in the morning (gawd that 5 minutes of extra sleep makes a LOT of difference!) Before I had it permed, my hair was this big ball of mess. Naturally thick, but neither straight nor wavy, it was a disaster. Everyday I would wash, dry and style it so that it wouldn't look like I just came straight from the cave with my roomate, Caesar the Ape. 

But, coming back to now, I'm pretty happy with my hair because lazy me doesn't have to do much than just to dry it after showering. And having a long hair somehow makes me feel more.. feminine. Yes  okay that may sound stupid, but that's the truth! And, my face looks less chubby. (What's new?)

But yeah, it's getting long.. and now the question is, what should I do?

Before I knew it, I had dialled my hairdresser's number and made an appointment for tomorrow. I guess we'll see what happens. (Maybe I would be tickled with that impulsive bug and decide to chop it all off..) 

2015: Our Best Year Yet!

Hello everyone! It's been a long time, I apologize. The last few months of last year have been crazy, and I mean crazy! I spent most of my time in Jakarta, and had my birthday, Christmas and New Year in the superbly breathtaking New Zealand!

2014 has been an awesome year, but I know that 2015 is going to be my best year yet!

So here are my new year's resolutions that I wrote during a company retreat in December.

Personal Goal
1) To start at least 2 new investments by this year.
2) To go to Japan and Harry Potter theme park
3) To write more. Blog at least once a week.
4) To finish Game of Thrones books

Family Goal
1) To spend more time with Dad and my sisters, if possible have another family vacation

Career Goal
1) To get a promotion (Update: I did it! Achieved in January, which means, maybe I need to aim for another promotion by this year? OH YES!)
2) To have an independent branch in Jakarta

Health Goal
1) To take part in at least 2 marathons this year

It doesn't seem much but I learnt not to set unrealistic expectations that are just going to demotivate you, but then again, my goal this year importantly above all those things that I've listed above, is to be a better me, in everything.

Better person, better daughter and sister, better girlfriend, better co-worker, better friend, better learner.. A me who is going to make me proud. 

I am so happy at where I am in my life now, and can't be more grateful for the people around me who have given me so much love and support. Together let's make this year a smashing mondofabulous one!

I'm going to blog and post pictures from my New Zealand trip soon, so stay tuned! :)

Keep smiling, because life is a beautiful thing and there's so much to smile about.

Shots of Awe.

To be an adult is to figure out the parameters that allow you to be a kid again.

Always.

If you ever wake up, and think that no one needs you, I need you. 

If you ever wake up, and think that there's no love, I will always love you. 

If you ever wake up, and can't find your purpose, I will hold a candle and help you find it. 

If you ever wake up, and don't know who or why you are, I can tell you. 

If you ever wake up, and don't know why you bothered, I will remind you. Please remember me, and let me give you reasons.

The Tension Between Who You Are

You want to be so many things. I always thought you would settle down one day and be ok with just being who you are. And what kind of monster would I be, to ask you to want to be less? Maybe wanting to be so many things, is just who you are.

How little they think of you.

I’m reminded once again on why Before Sunrise franchise is one of my all-time beloved movies. The characters are as real as you and me, and importantly the dialogues really touch me in a way that very few movies can.

When a movie speaks to you on such a personal level, it’s really quite something else. Especially for a hopeless romantic like me who loves words and finds meaning in every little detail. There are so many quotes from the movie that I love so much, but in this instance I would like to share one quote that resonates well with me.

“You know what’s the worst thing about somebody breaking up with you? It’s when you remember how little you thought about the people you broke up with and you realize that is how little they’re thinking of you. You know, you’d like to think you’re both in all this pain but they’re just like “Hey, I’m glad you’re gone.” 

I think it doesn’t just apply to romantic relationship, but also to friendship. You would think that when two people fall apart, we both would suffer the loss equally. But no, that’s not the case.

Sometimes I value my friendship too much, or I put too much expectation to it, I’ll just end up getting disappointed because it turns out that the other person just doesn’t give a fuck.

But then when everything is said and done, and you’re left with the loss of friend.. and you find yourself missing them, and think to yourself that they must miss this friendship too.. well, guess what, they probably don’t.

It’s just like that dialogue from the movie. That’s how little they think of you. And it hurts, it does. But reality hurts, and I’d rather deal with reality, no matter how sucky, than live in daydream illusion that the other person cares.

Growing away

When I look at you, I can see the person you used to be drowning in the person you are. And it makes me nostalgic and sad because I know when you look at me, you must see the same thing.

How I took part (and finished) my very first marathon.. (ever)

Last Sunday, I took part in my very first marathon!

"Whaaaaat?" I can hear all of you screaming in disbelief.

"But.... it can't be! You are the laziest, most unfit person I know!" Yes, I can still hear that!

Honestly (and shamelessly), it's true. What do you expect from a girl whose favourite past-time is sleep, and favourite day is Sunday just because she can sleep some more?

But hey, this year is all about change, right?

And I'm at that point where I feel that things are going well for me. Having a change of job this year is a huge positive step, and I'm truly happier, more aggressive than ever to do things that are normally out of my comfort zone.

So when I came across Great Eastern Marathon and one of my colleagues persuaded me to take part, I was like "Oh yes baby! This is for the new and improved Tina!" and before I knew it, I've signed up for 10km.

I thought I would have trained for it, but I didn't. Oh wait, I did, once. I ran and walked mostly for about 6km, and the second training never happened because oh well, life happened.

*Dramatic pause*

Next thing I knew, I was sent to Jakarta for over a month, and the race was nearing, in fact it was just a week away when I finally remembered that I haven't been exercising at all!

But it was too late to back out and besides, in my mind I was like, "How bad can it be?" So being an overconfident person (overcompensating for the fact that I really am not fit at all), I went to the race with 0 training. It was the first time I put on my running shoes after probably 2 months. Ha!

Before the race, having serious "Wtf, what am I thinking?" moment.

But hey, the fact that I'm writing this, 2 days after the race, means that I am still alive! Yay! And I completed the race with flying colors! (I'm also the teacher who passes the flying color mark) And although now my whole body is sore, and I'm walking with a limp, I feel really happy and proud that I did it! I would never think that I would be able to run 10km in my current state.

Mind over matter, baby.

The race was a fun experience. There were tens of thousands of people participating, and it's indeed encouraging to have so many people running around you; you can't be the only one slacking, can you?

Tina, time to hide your true color. Act like you're so into running!  

But seriously, there were times I had to stop running and did a slow-jog or brisk-walk instead, but overall I think I did okay and I enjoyed it! It was fun coming to different checkpoints, each km brought a wide grin over to our faces, and really, when you were in the moment, you couldn't even have thought of quitting. The energy was awesome!

And look, before I knew it, I completed it! (Not really, actually I knew it very, very clear) 

So that's the story of how I managed to do my very first marathon. I even have the medal to prove it! :)

Hey, if a lazy Tina can run for 10km, millions of life's possibilities are now within reach!

Kids! Go out there and explore! Be a scientist! Go to space! Learn dothraki! Anything's possible!

Lessons.

In recent years, I have learnt to appreciate genuine friends as they truly are. When we were younger, having a lot of friends was everything, don't you remember at how we used to measure one's popularity by seeing how many friends they have on Facebook? How vain can we be?

I come to treasure a few gems in my life who are not just convenient friends, or accidental friends, or even fake and superficial ones; but real, sincere and caring friends whom I know I can always turn to in times of need.

They may not be someone whom you meet every day or even every other week. But I think that's how you really know.

So let's cheer to our real friends whom are unaffected by life's circumstances.

Adventures in Jakarta

So yeah, life happens.

Long story short, I've had the opportunity to work in Jakarta for a temporary basis and hey, I can bitch about it, or I can be positive and have fun while I'm at it!

My best friend got married too! Timing of all timing, it was a beautiful experience to be a part of it! I'm now back in Singapore, but I won't see the last of Jakarta. Bring me more good food and cheap massage!

What touches you lately?

Sometimes a song can touch your heartstring and make you feel all sorts of emotions, and when that happens, it's just beautiful. 

For me, any songs from Sam Smith just frikking do it. If you haven't heard his songs, you totally should stop reading this junk and quickly start looking him up on youtube, trust me. 

He reminds me of Adele - but just better. His vocal is incredible - he has such a range too and it is thick with emotions. I find myself being very sad sometimes when I hear his songs - but that exactly what his songs are about, so I think that's really powerful.

My favorite at the moment is his track's called "Leave Your Lover". It's a song about a man's desperate plea in loving someone and begging that person to leave their lover for him. It's honest, heartbreaking, and really beautiful. Other tracks worth mentioning are "Lay By Your Side", "Latch" and of course "Stay With Me", but I've listened to his album and all his songs are equally great and it's definitely one killer album you have to hear it for yourself.