Welcome!: Boyhood

Sunday, 18 January 2015

Boyhood

I scream in delight when I heard about this movie. It's no surprise that I'm a huge, huge fan of Richard Linklater and the "Before" trilogy; in fact they are my most favourite movies of all time.

I remember being younger and so in love with Before Sunrise and Before Sunset that I had to make sure I made the guys I was currently dating watch (and love) them too. Somehow I wanted them to share the same deep emotional thoughts and wavelength that made me love these movies so much.

(No wonder those relationship never lasted. Ha!)

The genre is so unique; it's whether you love it, or you hate it. You either would fall deeply in love with it (like me), or find it super boring and when you just don't appreciate this type of deep conversation and relate able characters and pure emotions without exaggerating, special effects, all those Hollywood blah. My friend J is one of them.

In fact, now he admitted of finding it so boring that he almost fell to his death while watching it, but maintained his composure because ~~I threatened him~~ he wanted to impress me (so he said now). I probably had scarred him for life.

Anyway, I'm getting off track now. Let's get back to the point: Boyhood. Yes, so this is Richard Linklater's new movie and if you have been living in cave, I'm sure you've heard a huge buzz around; this being the only movie who took a spam of 12 years to film. It has also won a lot of awards (Golden Globes recently) and nominated for Oscars for more, including Best Picture and Best Director!

I missed seeing it in the cinema here, but I got lucky because the film was on the in-flight entertainment on my flight to Brisbane en route to New Zealand! So I spent almost 3 hours just indulging in this cinematic pleasure that brought back so much feelings and happiness (really similar feelings I have whenever I watch Before trilogy.)

My quickie review? It's an honest, real representation of a boy growing up in a family when like, all families, it's not always paradise. They overcome struggles and tears (divorce, alcoholic abusive dad, bullying at school, etc) but importantly also share the good times and, more importantly, how they stay together as a family despite their shortcomings.

I love, love, Patricia Arquette and Ethan Hawke in this. They make it flawlessly real and I can really feel Patricia's character's struggles being a single mom and doing the things she does. I love her! And as for Ethan Hawke, he's brilliant as expected, not that I ever doubted it.

Some of my favourite conversation from the movie:

Mason: Dad, there's no real magic in the world, right?
Dad: What do you mean?
Mason: You know, like elves and stuff. People just made that up.
Dad: Oh, I don't know. I mean, what makes you think that elves are any more magical than something like a whale? You know what I mean? What if I told you a story about how underneath the ocean, there was this giant sea mammal that used sonar and sang songs and it was so big that its heart was the size of a car and you could crawl through the arteries? I mean, you'd think that was pretty magical, right?

Mom: [Mason is leaving for college] This is the worst day of my life.
Mason: What are you talking about?
Mom: [Starts crying] I knew this day was coming. I just... I didn't know you were going to be so fucking happy to be leaving.
Mason: I mean it's not that I'm that happy... what do you expect?
Mom: You know what I'm realising? My life is just going to go. Like that. This series of milestones. Getting married. Having kids. Getting divorced. The time that we thought you were dyslexic. When I taught you how to ride a bike. Getting divorced... again. Getting my masters degree. Finally getting the job I wanted. Sending Samantha off to college. Sending you off to college. You know what's next? Huh? It's my fucking funeral! Just go, and leave my picture!
Mason: Aren't you jumping ahead by, like, 40 years or something?
Mom: I just thought there would be more..

The pace of the movie is slow; I found myself enjoying the first part of the film more than the last half, but overall I really enjoyed this journey. It's amazing seeing Mason (the main boy's character) grow up and see how he transforms to a young man and I think that's what happens to us: we get confused, distracted, frustrated sometimes at our lives. We act out, rebel as a teenager, but his mom is such a strong figure in his life that no matter what live throws at him, I feel that his mom can always keep him grounded.

You care so much about this family because you literally grow up with them. And I think this is the point of this crazy idea of shooting over the spam of 12 years. Anybody who watches it would relate so much to this person and this family.

Overall, I would recommend everyone to watch this! There are a lot of things I love about this film, and I found myself smiling and crying with them, and I think that says a lot when a film can make you feel that way.

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Quotes

There's a hundred million different ways of writing, and it takes you a long time to sort through that stuff. And I think it takes anyone a long time to find a voice.

You must learn to take the good with the bad, the happy with the sad, love what you’ve got and remember what you had. Learn to forgive, but never forget, learn from your mistakes but never regret. People change and things go wrong, but you just have to remember that life goes on.

The day before I’m supposed to be meeting Caroline for a drink, I develop all the textbook symptoms of a crush: nervous stomach, long periods spent daydreaming, an inability to remember what she looks like. I can bring back the dress and the boots, and I can see her bangs, but her face is a blank.

I don't know, I think that if I could just accept the fact that my life is supposed to be difficult. You know, that's what to be expected, then I might not get so pissed-off about it and I'll just be glad when something nice happens.

I can see now I never really committed to Laura. I always had one foot out the door, and that prevented me from doing a lot of things, like thinking about my future and... I guess it made more sense to commit to nothing, keep my options open. And that's suicide. By tiny, tiny increments.

There's a big fucking world out there. It's messy, and it's chaotic, and it's never, never ever the thing you'd expect. It is ok to be scared, but you cannot allow your fears to turn you into an asshole, not when it comes to the people that love you, the people that need you.

Maybe what I'm saying is, is the world might be evolving the way a person evolves. Right? Like, I mean, me for example. Am I getting worse? Am I improving? I don't know. When I was younger, I was healthier, but I was, uh, whacked with insecurity, you know? Now I'm older and my problems are deeper, but I'm more equipped to handle them.

I am nothing special; just a common man with common thoughts, and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. But in one respect I have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who's ever lived: I've loved another with all my heart and soul; and to me, this has always been enough.

Later that day I got to thinking about relationships. There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that's just fabulous.

A woman needs to be held, even, and science has shown this, if its with someone she doesn't care about. Protective hormones are released, and the amount of hormones released depends on the degree to which she is held. The first and best is the complete surround. He wraps you in both arms, whispers how beautiful you are. Second best is the 'arm around.' He is next to you but with one arm around you. Third is he's just next to you on his elbow, but he rests his hand on your stomach and looks at you. Fourth is you snuggling up to him with your head on his chest, while he looks away into space. But when the first best happens, you feel completely, wonderfully like a woman.

So, so what, so fuck off, go home, leave you alone? I'll tell you something Paul, there isn't anything that I've wanted for eighteen years, cause I was a kid eighteen years ago. And if I did still want the same things I'd think I'd gone wrong somewhere, because actually I don't want to marry David Cassidy, I don't want bigger tits, I don't want to do better on my marks. I've stopped worrying about that kind of thing and maybe you should try.

Well maybe there's a big bit of you that's gone missing somewhere, maybe everyone should want something they've always wanted.

Why is it that adults aren't supposed to go mad about anything? You gotta keep a lid on it. And if you don't then people are apparently entitled to say what they like. "You haven't grown up. You're a moron. Your conversation is trivial and boorish. You can't express your emotional needs. You can't relate to your children." And you die, lonely and miserable. But you know, what the hell, every cloud has a silver lining.

I just woke up one morning and didn't feel the same way. Where did it go? It was like there had been a lot of food on a plate in front of us, and we ate it all really quickly, and then there was nothing left. Maybe that's how couples stay together: they're not greedy. They know that what they have in front of them has to last a long time, so they kind of pick at it. I hope it's not like that, though. I hope that when people are happy together, it feels as though someone keeps piling seconds and thirds on their plates.

That is what I have learned: Sex is destructive. Love is nothing to be fooled with. I learned that I was dangerous, not to be trusted. I wondered if my parents were right, with all of their stiff lovelessness. Maybe they knew better. My parents don't dole out love for the deserving or the undeserving. I was learning that love could cost me.

You could say all you liked about reason and logic and common sense and imagination, but when the chips were down, the one skill you needed was the ability to think about absolutely nothing whatsoever.

There is a comfort in never making an effort, but it's a lonely comfort. What keeps you going is the knowledge that you're only playing with only four cards showing. But when you see other people succeeding with their mediocre hands, you have to make a decision. If you turn over that final card you're certain of victory, but it also means you have nothing in reserve.

I’d gone through life believing in the strength and competence of others; never in my own. Now, dazzled, I discovered that my capacities were real. It was like finding a fortune in the lining of an old coat.

Maybe we all live life at too high a pitch, those of us who absorb emotional things all day, and as mere consequence we can never feel merely content: we have to be unhappy, or ecstatically, head-over-heels happy, and those states are difficult to achieve within a stable, solid relationship.