Remind me to always count my blessings.

New layout again! I lurveee it! (yeah, and I said that before.) This is the thing about having a short attention span.

Anyway, can you guys believe it's almost July? It's literally, the second phrase of the year already. I can't help asking myself, what have you been doing? But I'm determined to just think positively about the whole thing. One can only try, and in the end that's what matters. Goodness, I have tried my hardest. What can I be ashamed of?

My good friend once said, "the best thing about you is that you don't give up," and I hope that's true. It'll be alright.

Now more than ever I want to believe it. And I do. I think. I'm blessed enough having such supportive family and friends who never made me feel any less, even though I had my fair share of feeling like a failure. I can only hope that what doesn't kill you, make you stronger.

I realize things may not always go according to plan. I think I was way too cocky and proud, to say that this has been an humbling experience is an understatement. I definitely learn a lot.

I have a plan. It's different than I had imagined at first, but it's something to get me forward. And more than anything, that's all I want.

Sunday

My precious!!! ♥

I ♥ Sundays! Wake up late, have homemade lunch, chill and unwind by the pool, read a book, what could be better than that? :)

Weight and Yoga

My yoga mat is so cute! Definitely the cutest one in the class! Yep, I've been doing yoga every week now, and I'm loving it! I'm not into intense working out (such as running and pretty much almost all sports there are), but yoga is definitely one of the really few exercises which I enjoy. I think my flexibility is rather impressive.

Speaking of which (exercise, not about being flexible), I'm desperately trying to lose weight. I'm ridiculously ballooning, which is funny in concept, I guess, but not so attrative in person. My weight has been fluctuating lately, and I'm the plumpest I've ever been.

I remember as a kid, I've never gained weight, even when I ate junk food most of the time and had meals between snacks. Everyone commented, "you're so skinny!" everytime we went to visit distant relatives or family friends.

So from all that stability in the past, maybe it's time for fairness to settle in? Equilibrium? I need to gain huge amount of weight to compensate for all those younger years. Of course.

[Normally I cringe seeing old pictures 'cos I always think I looked so weird in those, but lately I don't mind flipping open some not-so-recent images when I still felt damn confident wearing skimpy shorts and halter tops. Now my thigh is almost too huge to handle.]

ps. I allow myself to be completely shallow sometimes.

Attica Friday

So yesterday night I was out in Clarke Quay with my two friends, again. I realized lately that I have been there much more than I normally do, not that there's anything wrong with it. Sometimes it's not much of the partying-aspect of it, it's just the feeling that you get when you're inside a club, absorbed with the music and ambience and the full-energized crowds, it's pretty awesome. Of course, since we're at it, we might as well dance our socks off, work out and burn out carbs in the process, and occasionally entertain random approaches by fellow cute partygoers.

It started early last night since I was out for karaoke session with my sister and cousin beforehand. They really are the best singing companions, because we all know the same songs and we can sing and act really dorkily to boybands and disney songs without weird glances from anyone. We went to the KTV place in Shenton Way, which I've never tried out before. KTV is supposedly better, (and more expensive, as it turns out) than our usual Kbox, but it was a good change for once-in-a-while-occasion. We had chicken wings and some assorted snacks and bubbles teas to last us the three-hours session. Blissfull.

Still in the pumped out mood from all those singing, I went straight to Clarke Quay to meet my friends and got it Attica a little before 11 for free. Now, I don't know if you've been to Attica, but it's my favorite club at the moment for the reason I can't quite pinpoint. My friend once joked and said that there's a saying: 'all roads lead to Attica', because of that precise appeal.

To me, whenever I go to Attica, I always have fun, and so the experience is never dissapointing.I would gladly go to Attica any day of the week, and we started going there on Friday night more instead of just the usual ladies night on Wednesday. The crowds are better, and yesterday wasn't an exception.

The first floor of the club is playing RnB music, while the second storey called Attica Too, is sporting techno. We always spend most of our time in the first floor, 'cos that's where we can really dance, and occasionally when we need to take a breather and get a change of scenery, we go upstairs and hang by the bar or join in the dance floor as well for a while. I secretly think that the people upstairs are much more good-looking, (although the chances of you being picked on by sleazy guys are much higher too.)

By the end of the night, my heels were killing me, but my spirit was high. As always, I had lots of fun and we met (and avoided) some fun crazy people. It's funny that after coming there regularly for a while, you start to recognize the fellow regulars as well. There were some guys there yesterday whom I have met last Wednesday and I just wanted to avoid them, so everytime he (the one person I would most like to avoid at all costs) was in near sight, my friend would hysterically yell, 'he's behind YOU' and I would run to the opposite direction as fast as I could. It happened a lot of times until I convinced myself the whole thing's just ridiculous. One minute we were dancing and laughing along, the next second I was scrambling and running away like I was a pickpocket.

ps. Remember when I mentioned in previous post that I never witnessed anything exciting? Well, last night when the club closed and we were resting our legs in the bench right outside, there was a little fight going on between a drunk caucasian man and the big Attica's bouncer. It was stupid, the bouncer was clearly twice his size, and it seems that he was drunk so most probably he was the one at fault, and he was yelling 'fuck you, you fag!' to the bouncer's face while the bouncer remained quiet, just fixing him an intense look. I wouldn't wanna be in his bad side, if I were him. But no fist fight happened, it was just slightly tense to witness, and in the end the fellow bouncers pushed him aside, and there was nothing left but the eerie silence of the dawn.

Close to Swine Flu

How do you guys feel about swine flu?

Well, it's a retarded question, 'cos any pandemic diseases are terrible things. I actually just wanna talk about it in a more personal level.

In news gathering class, we learn that proximity is as an important factor in news writing as prominence, or even timeliness. Although, yes, there is a term, 'news is new', and no such thing like 'it's only newsworthy when it's close to you', but that it true. Of course we are proned to be more affected when something occurs nearby, rather than if it happens in Timbuktu, or somewhere far away.

Well, anyway, I'm kinda rambling here. The relation between these all with my first question about swine flu is that, yes, WHO has upped the pandemic alert to 6, and hundreds of people have died because of it, and not one day passes by without a mention of swine flu in the news. Of course this is an enough reason for everybody to freak out and feel scared.

But, I haven't been really thinking about it, or allowing myself to be worried. It's like those things when you're almost certain it won't ever happen to you, because, well, just because. I'm relatively a boring person, and nothing ever really happens to me. I have never witnessed anything particularly exciting, like one time in Oklahoma, two of my classmates ran back to class, all sweaty and breathless, and they were like, "Oh my god, we just saw a chase between a police car and some bad guy and there were guns!" See, I have never been in that situation, even a minor one. My sister was once in the taxi and it hit another car, so there was this major fight drama, involving both drivers yelling and cursing at each other. Nothing ever happened to me, that the thought of swine flu doesn't even affect me anymore.

The possibility of me actually catching swine flu is even more unlikely than having pigs shooting out of my arse.

So this morning I was browsing news in the internet and read that there were another 16 new cases of swine flu in the island. Normally, I would have known that the victims must have been like, foreign students who just came back from US, and their friends, or their relatives. But these last few days, the pattern has been slightly inconsistent, because cases were found locally. It's like, having set up a parameter to protect a country from the outside, and suddenly finding out that there's a mole inside, and that sort of just changes everything. (Have I been seeing too much '24'?)

Anyway, this is what I came across:

A third cluster of locally—infected cases has also been identified at popular nightclub Butter Factory at One Fullerton.

The new case is a 19—year—old Singaporean female student. She visited the
club on June 17 when three previously reported cases were also there.

The Health Ministry has advised all those who had visited Butter Factory on
June 17 to monitor their health and seek medical attention if they feel
unwell.

At first I thought it was funny, 'cos hey, I went to Butter Factory just last week. And then I checked the date, and oh shit! It was Wednesday, the same night I was in the club.

Actually, we were planning to check out the new branch of the club in Fullerton, and we were already there, trying to get in. But the queue was ridiculously long, which we didn't expect at all. We sort of hung around and said hi to a couple of friends we accidentally met there, but later decided to just leave to another place.

Was the poor swine-flu victim there among the crowd when we were there? Or has she perhaps, gone inside? Only then did it hit me, how close we were, are, to everything. And I don't know, maybe it's not such a crazy idea to think that it could happen to me, to all of us.

I'm not gonna start freaking out or anything, but just a kind reminder to everyone, I think it won't hurt to pay more attention to our health, to take care of ourselves a little better. We will be fine as long as our immune system is good, and that means, don't let yourself get too tired, never miss a meal, drink a lot of water, and rest enough.

And, good luck to us.

Cab drivers

Choosing a cab is like, choosing your food at dinner. Choose wisely and you may end up with complete satisfaction and sweet memories, and crap choices leave you with upset stomache and a case of diarrhea.

The reason I said this, because at times your fate really lies in the hand of a cab driver, hence, making this decision-making process a very important one. Good driver is hard to come by, and the bad ones seem to be everywhere. Bad cab drivers are the worst, they make Hitler seem mild.

The bad ones are rude and harsh. They speak in broken english, scold you for being ignorant and not being able to speak chinese, and drive like they're doing stunts in bad action movies.

The bad ones snort when you say 'thank you', grunt rudely when you pull out a fifty-dollar bill and comment on your outfit.

The good drivers, however, appear like Princess Diana in comparison. They smile and make jokes, they strike up a nice conversation, and they say 'thank you' back after you. These people make the world a better place.

Although it seems trivial, I actually think this is rather important. And makes me feel all the more grateful everytime I get the good ones.

Yesterday was one example. I went back by cab from Clarke Quay in the morning, and I was ready to pay when we arrived by the lift in my apartment's basement. I pulled out the only dollar bill I had at that moment, which was fifty bucks, and handed it over. He looked at me, all apologetic, saying he just began his shift and thus, absolutely had no change.

'So how?' I asked. We could go to 7/11 to exchange money but the store was on the opposite street and I was too tired to function. He looked at me for a few seconds, and pulled out a piece of paper, wrote down his account number and told me to just transfer the money to there.

I was slightly taken aback, because well, it is unusual, right? $14.20 doesn't seem that much, but he had no guarantee, technically that I would really pay him the fare later. Of course, aside fro my trustworthy look, but people say that looks can be deceiving, right? In my exhausted state, I was really grateful for this person. Because he trusted me enough, this means I could go straight upstairs and crash to bed.

Well, actually I still had to wipe off make-up, change into pajamas, and take off my lens, but you got the drift.

It's always nice when a complete stranger makes a kind gesture. Especially taxi drivers, since there are just too many of the bad ones out there, clustering the world.

I'm in Love

[This is written in a rather dramatic effect, but all circumstances are real.]

Last night was the night that I saw literally, the man of my dream.

You know that epitome of your ideal guy? The exact picture of someone that comes to mind whenever people look at you and ask, "so, what's your type?" You say, this or that, and you know this probably wouldn't happen in real life, but you're happy enough living in a temporary fantasy that maybe you will be lucky and snatch gold. Maybe you'll end up being with someone you've always pictured yourself with, maybe your boyfriend will exactly be your 'type'

[I'm talking about the physical appearance]

So anyway, last night I saw the visual image of my 'perfect man' come to live in the form of a guy so gorgeous and so handsome I was certain I fell in love right there and then. Okay, please try not to puke, will you?

I was in Attica with a friend, and we were making our way through the crowded dancefloor to the stairs. My friend was in front of me, and this perfect guy happened to be walking in front of her. I saw his perfect height (probably in all his 6'5'' glory) and his perfect neat, short cropped blond hair. And then he turned around, and he had the most beautiful face behind the most beautiful black-rimmed glasses, and my heart literally leaped.

He smiled! He smiled at me! I almost fainted, but I managed to pull what I hoped was a friendly inviting smile, but I'm afraid at that state of shock, I might have grimaced instead. We were still walking while this happened, and he purposely turned back again to look at me, still flashing that gorgeous smile. Oh my god, my knees gave away. I think I waved. I think! I felt dizzy out of love!

We got to the stairs and this man got in the loo which was located near the stairs, and suddenly I didn't want to go down! Suddenly I wanted to stay there right where he was, although I had no form of plan whatsoever! I pulled my friend and I said, "I'm in love with that guy in glasses."

Bless her, she agreed to stay with me there and waited for the guy to come out from the bathroom and then, well, hopefully we would have figured out a plan of action. So we were standing by the bar while my heart was pounding crazily. To be honest I would have believed you if you said that I just envisioned him smiling at me, that maybe it was just in my head, but I had to keep the faith!

A few minutes passed by and I was ready! I would say 'hello' even if it kills me!

Suddenly out of nowhere an indian guy was in front of me, and he was talking as if he's the twenty-first-century's Romeo. "Don't you know that I have been following you? I think you are beautiful," he said. "Will you be the witness at our wedding?" he asked my friend, and he went on and on with his most over-the-top and corniest praises. My friend and I were glancing at each other, thinking 'is he for real?' I've never really heard anyone say things like that before, ever.

But the damage is done. After I managed to shush him away (it took so long, dammit), I had no idea where my prince charming went! I should have been right outside, welcoming him with the warmest smile when he came out from the loo! (okay, that wasn't a very smart and romantic scenario, but it would have to do!) And now, if he really has noticed and smiled at me before, he would have thought this weirdo guy was with me, or worse, that I had the stupidest taste in men.

There is no comparison! Look at him! He's literally the most beautiful man I've ever seen! We'll have the most gorgeous wedding ever, and our babies will be devastatingly gorgeous!

Seriously, people. I have the wildest imagination. Then again, I'm in love!

This wasn't something I'm particularly proud of, but I was stalking him the entire night! How could I not?! But since then, he was within his big group of friends (and girls!) in the crowded dancefloor, him towering in the middle with all his handsomeness. Going in there to say hello to him would be like, trying to knock down the Great Wall of China. Those possies possies were like, the defender of the ancient treasure. Those players in front of the goal line in football. Secret Service protecting the President.

I saw my happy wedding and beautiful babies dream slowly evaporated and diminished by the second.

By 5, the man of my dream left, and as I bid a secret tearful goodbye, I wondered if I would ever see him again.

I don't know what is it about him and why it affected me so much. Afterall, it's not like there is a shortage of good-looking guys out here, but this is exactly MY PERFECT MAN we're talking about here. This seriously will bug me for the rest of the week. Or month.

Music

My playlist changes every so often. It's important to listen to certain music when you're experiencing different emotions.

Some Clay Aiken and Maroon 5 remind me of my youthful existence, while Horseshoe Road simply transports me straight to the country where there's nothing much but land and greens. Natasha Bedingfield makes me feel girly, James Morrison gets me all mellow, and Marvin Gaye, well, you don't say. "Let's Get It On"? "Sexual Healing"? Those are probably the sexiest tunes known to man.

Anyway, although my musical knowledge is very limited (and very 90s, I'd say), I do know what kind of music I absolutely enjoy listening to for every occasion. This week, these are my top two singers/bands:

1. The Script

I love these guys from the moment I listened to 'We Cry'. 'Breakeven' and 'The Man Who Can't Be Moved' are equally as catchy and moving. They're pretty huge in their Ireland hometown, and their album has apparently reached multi-platinum. I love their latest single, 'Talk You Down' too, check it out if you wanna know what they sound like.

2. Ben Folds

A friend of mine actually introduced me his music. I listened first to 'Hiroshima' and 'Rocking The Suburbs', and thought they were really quirky and unique. You should listen to 'Bricks' and 'Landed' too, but this one is my personal favorite, 'Evaporated'.

If you bother to listen, let me know what you think.

So, until next time!

An Unexpected Call

(Phone rings)

Me : Hello?

Man : Hello? Singapore Police????

Me : WHAT????!!!!

Man : Ohh,.. (hangs up)

The world is a crazy place.

Your friends are what will matter in the end

Rocking the stripes.

♥ ♥ ♥

A Letter to Facebook

Dear Facebook,

You're great, and I have enjoyed your service for years now. I have to say that so far I've been really pleased with you. You're tentative, caring, fast, and very helpful.

You know everything about me, from my date of birth to my sexuality to my political reference, and I guess that makes us good friends at least.

You probably know too that I haven't been seeing anyone since, well, I don't know, April. But I'm completely okay and thus, I don't need to meet new men. I get it that you only want the best for me, and I really appreciate your concern, but I am not in any way lonely to resort to your suggestion to go on a Speed Date.

You gave me a list of the men you thought I might fancy. There's Matthew, Christopher and Malcolm, just to mention a few. And wow, you even said I can just click away to view more men! The trouble you went just to compile this list. I'm impressed. Maybe you matched our religious view or something.

But anyhow, although we are good friends, we're not that close. So can we please leave my love life to rest? I assure you that our relationship is perfect at it is, when I do all the talking and you're just there listening. It works best that way, don't you think?

Glad we have that straightened out.

Love,
Tina

Weekend in KL

I'm back to civilization from Kuala Lumpur over the weekend!

No, I'm kidding. KL was great! I had an awesome, albeit short time there. In fact, it feels just perfect, having another day will probably spoil the rotten ouf of the whole thing, 'cos two nights with a snoring man is still tolerable, but any longer, you may have to shoot me. I need my beauty sleep, period.

We stayed at Ancasa Hotel, which is very convenient 'cos Chinatown was just right around the corner, and you can always find cheap and good food over there. The place's constantly packed too with tourists and locals selling various stuffs from T-shirts and fake designer handbags. The amount was just overwhelming! We spent nights having beers or cups of coffee in the street, enjoying the noise and surroundings and people singing 'Country Roads'. It was pretty darn awesome.


Sometime, during the day, my dad or Laurie would crave a cup of coffee (the thing about travelling with caffeine-junkies), and we had to find a little coffee shop, conversed in funny Malay slangs (which I always found amusing, cos some Malay words sound funny to me) with the locals around, and I don't know, it's just more liberating talking to people when you're a tourist, for some reason, as if that gives us an excuse to be an annoying blabber-mouth.

And of course, I visited the Twin Tower. I never really see a big deal of the place, but it's just like, Merlion to Singapore, or well, what's the equivalent of that in Jakarta, I wonder? I'd say Monas? It's like, you gotta go there, otherwise you haven't really been there, you know? But well, I enjoyed it too, and the tower was rather majestic in my opinion, which was cool. (Man, I love it that I just used the word majestic.)

We went to a couple of shopping malls also, like the Times Square, Sungai Wang and Bukit Bintang. Saw the KL Tower from afar, and wandered around aimlessly through the city. Oh! I had a full body massage over there too, which was a complete bliss!

I've always been kinda skeptical about massaging shops like these, 'cos they seemed rather shady, and I heard lots of dogdy stories from people too. So my dad made sure we chose the 'legit-looking' shop, although it was also in the side of the street. It wasn't in the mall or hotel or anything; it was just this little stand and as we were passing though, the workers approached us with the brochures of the service. It was a scorching hot afternoon, and I was like, 'man, a massage right now will just be amazing,' So I went in and had an hour of complete zen.

It seems like I was the only female customer in there though,which was...well, interesting. They asked if I wanted a male or female massaeur, what do you reckon?!

One thing I love about taking trips is also the fact that I got to stay in a hotel. It's not that this experience is particularly exciting in itself, but I don't know, I just love hotels. I love hotel rooms and I love the breakfast every morning. Hotel breakfast is one of the best thing in life, and also totally underrated.

There's a downside of KL too. Well, it's maybe not a downside, it's just a fact. Every country's different, right? Their taxis, for example. Although it's clearly written 'metre-taxi' in big bold capital letters on the side of the cars, no taxi in KL operates with metre-system. You had to bargain your price, well, they demaded the price is more likely. I have a feeling we were ripped off everytime we took a cab. It's annoying but that's the way it is.

But I have no complaints for the rest of the trip. It was fun being with my dad, and seriously, it's like I turned into five years old again! I kept like, clinging on to him, hugging him and making jokes and it's like, what the hell is going on with me? Ha-ha. I love my dad.


Anyway, it's back to reality now, ah bugger. It has been an awesome weekend full of denials (ha!)

Dad's Visit

My dad is coming in to town.

I'd like to think that the reason for this rather unexpected visit is because he misses me terribly, and he can't wait telling me in person how proud he is of this middle daughter of his, despite my lack of accomplishment in the past twenty-two years. Well, not really, I think I was quite pride-worthy during my earlier ages, when I haven't been smeared too much by life's negativity and a slash of reality check (and the introduction of television). Still, the dad-kid proud thing, that's normally a given, right? Even when I feel like a failure, surely he's still obligated to pat me in the back and say, 'I'm proud of you, kiddo', right?

Anyway, the big man feels the need to come all the way down here, just because well, it's because of me, but not because he's tearing up in gratitude for my blissful and buoyant existence. Quite the opposite, I have a feeling he comes here to...console me.

Yeah. Ladies and gentlemen. The biggest loser right here. Woo. Where's my crown and tiara?

My dad isn't the most sensitive father, or person, in that matter. But I feel that he's been very supportive over the past few months, especially. And I will not let his kind gesture unreturned. I'm sure I can think of many ways to show him my gratitude, which will come to me...any minute now.

Can I get back to you on that? Let me sleep on that.

Low

You once said,

"Believe me, the only good things in life are the ones you work hard for."

Is that true?

F***

Am I just destined to have this sucky, sucky luck? Everything's a mess, it's all fucked up. And I'm so angry but I have noone to direct this anger to, and in the end I can only sit here feeling angry at my stupid luck. No, it's not even luck, it's just the way things work out around me. It's a sucky, sucky thing. Why does everything have to be so fucking hard? Why is it so fucking complicated? And eventhough I have people around, supporting and being there for me, I've never felt more alone.

Rollercoaster of J

/ / At first it was curiousity, and then interest. Crush.

Then there was the connection, and the sparks. The beginning, and the middle. Ups and downs. Intensity. Day in and out, jokes, a few fights and make ups.

There was a peak, and then it just seemed to wear off. More fights and less make ups. Dissapointment and misunderstanding.

And then it was nothing. Absence. Evaluation and distant memory. Sensitivity over the smallest reminders and fresh wound.

But then there was time. And everything felt okay at last. No frets and grimace. There was realization and acceptance. Content.

And finally all's left was just a sweet memory. / /

Religious fanatics are scary in any country.

I found that religion is a personal thing, and although it may be less awkward than asking 'what's your favourite sexual position?', questions and especially, judgment towards one's belief system is extremely inappropriate.

So I only have two words for those people who find it in their gut to stop unsuspecting strangers, like myself, in the middle of the street, to lecture and preach about the Kingdom of God and eternal life: bugger off.

I'm sorry, I don't mean to be harsh. But I was the one feeling offended, honestly. Anyway, I have no problem wasting away good minutes of my life helping out and filling surveys or questionnaires, I really don't. And that's why I smiled politely and stopped, thinking 'hey, today is the day I'm gonna do some good deeds and help out these people.'

I regretted it immediately just after one question muttered by the lady. "Do you believe in God?" she asked. Even after I said 'yes' cautiously, she had this look that made me almost believe she would pass out right there and then if I have answered 'no'.

"Have you finished reading the bible?" she pursued. Oh, heck, no! Transfixing my focus on just completing the survey so I could walk out of there as fast as possible, I chose to mumble incoherently at this question because that was none of her business at all.

She pressed on by pulling out her bible, flipping the pages and from the rows and rows of various highlighted colours, I safely assumed that not only she has finished reading it from cover to cover, she probably had everything memorized as well.

I'd always found these downright Christian fanatic to be more than a walking cliche. I didn't much care about what they got up to in the privacy of their own churches, but it bothered me a lot when it all came out into the open. I didn't like them trying to persuade and affect people on the matter of such sensitive and personal subject, I didn't like them handing me leaflets about the bible and eternal life, and mostly, I didn't like them stopping me in the middle of the street trying to palm off their literature on me.

She asked all sorts of questions, read to me quotes from the bible, and I thought I made myself pretty clear that I needed to walk away by my clearly-pissed-face, but the gesture seemed lost on her. She wanted me to come to her church because according to her, most churches teach the wrong things. "Just look at the priests, and even the Pope; they are wearing something on their head, when in fact, here," she quickly flipped through the pages of the bible and read it aloud, "here, it's clearly stated that it's considered disrespectful to wear something on the head."

She looked at me, rather triumphantly, and I'm so tempted to argue. There's famine, and wars, and poverty, global warming, and diseases in this world. And you think we give a rat's tootsie about some head-accessories and whether it's disrespectful or not? There are probably fiften-hundred-thousand other things that we should worry about before we got to that, let alone actually care.

"Oh yeah, that is horrible. Wearing something on their heads, what a sin. Unforgivable." was what I wanted to say, but I heard myself say, "I have my own church, thanks" instead. I think I handled it pretty calmly, considering. Inside, my blood was boiling. Still, she wouldn't let it go.

"I appreciate the talk, but I don't need to go to another church because I have my own. And I really have to go now," and before she could argue, I left. I was still thanking her? I have such good manner. I said I would help them out with their surveys and that's what I did. The rest was completely unnecessary.

I don't mind talking about religion, really. I'd be more than happy to be able to exchange ideas, tell people about my view on the world, and about God, and listen to the same. But not this way, not through this preaching, and judging, and lecturing, and shoveling the bible down my throat as if they know the best.

Blackberried-Dad

My dad is getting hopelessly addicted to his Blackberry. I just know! At first, he didn't even bother to know how to use the extra applications. For all he knew, just so long as he could make a call, compose a text message, and check his e-mail every once in a while, the world was in order. The big man's happy.

Now, he started asking me to go online at MSN so we could chat, and he emailed me numerous times a day, which is fine, really. I kinda feel like a little girl again. And then he recently moved on to taking pictures with his phone and sending them over, a 'skill' which I'm pretty positive he didn't possess a few weeks ago. He couldn't even open an attachment on an email then, and now, check him out!

Apparently the Blackberry has changed his life. I have to admit, that little gadget is pretty sweet, but I haven't seen it as an absolute necessity yet! But a friend of mine has been bugging me to buy a damn Blackberry for so long, giving his best persuasion: 'it's like having the world at the palm of your hand!' while caressing his impressive BB javelin. He even asked me to take pictures with my camera and compared the quality with those taken from his BB, and smugly mocked, 'wow! BB camera is even better than a camera-camera!'

Oh, bugger off. I'm still perfectly happy with my LG Secret, thank you very much.

But, I'm indeed impressed by Dad. He's getting in with the trend: The BB, MSN and Facebook! He asked me to tag a couple of pictures of him so he could get some good ones for his profile! Anyway, I'm pretty happy with his tech-improvement. Why? Because it's easier for me to ask for money now. Ha-ha.

Oh, I love that picture. It was taken back in 2007, when Dad was still looking sharp with his short hair. Not saying he's not now. It's just now he's sporting that Beatles-inspired hair-do which is quite amusing and freaky at the same time. Ah, bless him.

silence is gold. well, just this time.

It's so funny that after I wrote that entry about my preference to email, a few people started emailing me again, saying "damn, girl, you should've said that earlier!" Huh, how could this be my fault? Ha-ha. I appreciate the thoughts, though!

Anyway, there's nothing much that I want to write at the moment. Yesterday I went to the office to settle more administrative stuffs, yeah, paperwork, paperwork, yawn, yawn. I didn't want to tell people that I already got a job not because I was trying to hide it or anything, heck, why would I hide it? I would have screamed on top of my lungs and gulped ten shots of tequila if I could, that's how excited I was when I first got the news.

The reason that I haven't exactly told anyone, well, of course besides close family and friends, is that I can't help feeling anxious still. The company has extended their offer and although I haven't started work yet, things are official. But, there's still a matter of my employment pass. Yesterday after speaking again with the finance manager at the office, they have submitted my application to the government, and now all we can do is wait. Technically, everything should work out well, and in two to three weeks time, I will have gotten the approval and I can then, start my job.

However, me being miss panicky as I am, I keep thinking that things might go wrong in the process, that the government might find tiny little details that might jeopardize my visa being approved. What tiny details, I've no idea. And having been rejected for no reason at all when I applied for social pass extension a few months back made me skeptical, bitter, and extremely uncertain.

I thought, I wouldn't tell anyone until everything is final, until I know for sure that there won't be any problem with my employment pass, and then I will get wasted from tequila shots. And all that jazz. Real celebration will entail, and ridiculous amount of confetti will be dropped. And not a second earlier. I know, I'm so negative, but can you blame me, considering after the whole social-pass-debacle?

Some people knew, not many at all. Or so I thought. That's why I was very surprised that this morning a text message came from a friend I haven't heard in ages. In fact, she's more of an acquaintance rather than a friend, if you know what I mean. She congratulated me for my new job, and how she even knew about it, I couldn't possibly imagine.

So since apparently it's no longer news, I might as well say it here. I'm extremely excited for the job, but like I said, I'm kinda still at the edge of my seat about the whole visa thing. I just hope nothing goes wrong, and please don't let me jinx it.

(I don't even feel right taking about the job itself. You would think I'm gonna be mafia or a social worker or something humiliating. I'm not. Just cross that off your list and stop with the excessive imagination.)

Until then, I guess I'm staying sober. And trust me, when everything works out, there. will. be. confetti. and loudness. and hysteria. and lots and lots of alcohol. Ha!

Look Alike

It's been the talk of everyone in town. How could Zooey Deschanel look like the instant replica of Katy Perry, I would never know.

Zooey Deschanel, the American actress has been starring in various movies since 1999, but I haven't really seen any of her movies except The Happening a while ago. And Katy Perry? You would have been living in a bloody cave if you've never heard of this girl. I love her music, and am currently hooked on 'Waking Up in Vegas' now.

Google both of their names, and you'll see results from 'are they the same person?', 'how to tell the difference?', 'separated at birth' to 'zooey: don't call me Katy Perry!'

Hilarious! They must be the most-twin-like-non-twin pair ever =p

Look Alike

Isn't it just amusing when you find a person who looks exactly like someone else you've seen before? Well, I think it is. And I'm pretty good with people's faces, so I notice this a lot.

I found this pretty cool, actually. So I thought I'd put this 'look-alike' category to share with you all whenever I 'spot' a new pair of similar faces. Let you be the judge. My eyesight and observation skill is pretty damn excellent.

Tonight's episode will be between Chris Pine and David Sutcliffe.

Chris Pine, (left) starred in Princess Diaries 2, but most of you probably just recognized him as Captain Kirk from Star Trek. And I'm a big fan of David Sutcliffe in Gilmore Girls where he plays an ever-cool-and-witty-Christopher Hayden.

They really do look freakingly alike!

I gotta admit, Chris has the more intense eyes, but I still think David is hotter! (Which is why I should show my best friend this picture since she's a huge fan of Chris Pine.)

Email is the new messenger.

I may not be too old-fashioned as to still send hand-written postcards with stamps, but I'm a firm believer in emails. Still.

In this age, (and I'm not speaking in business-related concept), emails are getting exceptionally foreign and rare to find. It's easier to just send a text message and chat in various instant messenger services over the net. People hardly ever send emails to each other again, and hasn't it been not too long ago that emails-phenomenon itself was booming and you received mails for the most insignificant and unimportant thing ever?

(I used to receive so many chain-emails from friends with various topics from 'have you believed in Jesus?' to 'warning for contact lens' users!' But these days the only 'junk' emails I got, so to speak, are those information involving viagra. Seriously.)

It used to be 'what's your e-mail address?', and now it's all about 'do you have MSN?' and 'what's your facebook address?' When you meet new people, it's exciting to get to know each other through emails first; ask and get the answer, but now? Just from facebook you could know the most intimate, detailed information about the other person that easily. You don't even have to work for it. Suddenly, he saw your less-than-attractive drunken pictures taken eons ago. No wonder it's harder to meet someone special nowadays.

I mean, I love chatting too and most people know I'm more of a SMS-person rather than a phone-person, but when it comes to emails, I think it serves an entirely different purpose and thus, is still irreplaceable.

(Besides, I'm a lot wittier in e-mails. Or so I'd like to think.)

A friend and I have been talking through e-mails for a long time now, but lately we have gotten lazier and opted for the easier messenger instead. Rather, he has. So I sent him an email again last night to get ourselves back to our roots, but he decided to 'just wait 'til you (meaning me) get online to reply.' See? He was all like, 'I feel like talking to a wall, I like chatting instead 'cos I can know your reaction immediately.'

Like all things in the world, email too isn't perfect. But how could he, or you all, forget that email is still a wonderful thing? It has taken us so long to get here, we should still embrace and celebrate the wonder of being able to truly ramble and tell long stories without distraction and instant mockery from the other party! Don't deny us from our rights!

Sorry, got carried away there.

It's the most traditional way to communicate in this all-digital world, and let's not forget that. I mean, I like writing email and receiving one; it feels more personal, and liberating.

Maybe I should remind my friend, and you all, why we should still rejoice emails even though there are newer (not necessarily better) ways to achieve the same purpose.

Email is easy. There won't be any bills to settle and you can compose emails in five hours (or whatever long you want), in between lunch, television, or any other activities. [insertions here] Totally non-intrusive.

Email is cheap! It's practically free since almost all of you have all-around-the-clock internet connection anyway. Unlike long-distance telephone calls, international smses, you can communicate until your fingers are crammed with anyone on earth.

Email is fast, it takes only a second (or a minute, max) to get your 5-pages long rambling email to reach its destination wherever, may it be to a neighbour across the street, or to anyone on the other side of the planet. 5 pages? Hell, try 10 pages long. Can do!

Emails can be stored. It's easy to save messages and open them again in the future. Unless your computer died of old age, it's most likely that your emails will outlive you. Ha-ha.

Emails is flexible. You can attach pictures, sound files, videos and documents; you can choose to send one email to a number of different people, and it's worldly universal.

Let's all take a step back and remember why emails were awesome in the first place. Just because there's a crispy chicken, doesn't mean the original isn't as good. (Okay, bad metaphor.) I just miss the more conventional way, that anticipation of waiting for a reply, taking pleasure in reading a sort-of-letter (well, it's as close to actual letter than anything else in this era, right?), and express your inner dorkiness when you write one.

I can't believe I put this much emphasis on emails, but hey, a girl has to speak her mind. Instant messengers are great, but there's still no such thing as email. Use it!

No idea what I'm blabbering about.

So, even though things are starting to look up, it seems, I still managed to stress myself out with lots of 'what ifs' and negative thoughts. I am impossible to please. Impossible!

No, everything is good, I'm just being my old panicky-self, and despite the cool, calm weather (metaphore), I can't help feeling anxious as if a storm is about to hit anytime soon. Someone should slap me and say, 'Chill. Nothing bad is gonna happen, everything's good. Stop being so paranoid!'

(Instead, I spent too much time listening to this. An amazing song, and a few minutes later you would realize you've lost your appetite and the will to live. Okay, I exaggerated. The song's gloomy but I love it.)

I don't want to go into details right now, 'cos a lot are still in progress, but when I get everything confirmed, I will write, no, bore you to death with the updates. Hope it's gonna be great news! Martini for everyone! (Just keep your freshly-manicured fingers crossed for me!)

Speaking of martini, well, speaking of booze in general, I had an awesome weekend with the family. Sis got a new phone on Saturday after we spent a few hours visiting shops and comparing specs and prices (she got an all-touch-screen LG cookie!), and we had a great dinner, drinks and lots of tear-jerking, heart-to-heart conversation. Who am I kidding? We had gibberish talks, as usual. But it was amazing. Sis and I went for lunch and didn't even realize that we have been sitting there for 2 hours just talking. Rather loudly. (It wasn't me, I swear.)

These past few days I have managed to more books, done some writings, watched more movies, and I'm happy with the way things are going. Like I said, I should just stop being so anxious.

Anyway this entry has been a total gibberish. Let me put you out of your misery right now!

A side of change

June is here! And I'm welcoming it with wide, open arms! Wide as my waistline and as open as the skeletons in my closet.

It's going to be a month of change, (well, yeah, from May, obviously. It's time to flip a new page in our organizer, start afresh, yada yidi yada) but I foresee it's gonna be a good one.

Here's the month when I'm going to step into a new territory; uncharted water if you fancy the sailor language. I normally detest change, but I'm kinda excited for this one. Stay tuned.