Night at the Salsa Club

I just came back from salsa club, where I had my first ever salsa lesson! Well, I didn't go there particularly to dance salsa, 'cos even before learning it, I knew I would suck. Sometimes you just know things! Actually, I came there to celebrate!

I should probably tell you that I received an amazing news today, and I have been restless ever since. I just wanted to go out and blow off some steam, drink a little. Just at that vulnerable moment did I say 'okay!' to going to a place where I could easily humiliate myself. Under normal circumstances, I would have been more than reluctant getting into a scenario where public embarrassment would be simply inevitable.

This is one of them.

It's salsa slash fashion show event there tonight, so it was definitely interesting. Before the show began, I was forced to take this lesson for the beginners. You know, I was shown the basic steps and we had to dance and exchange partners. I completely suck.

No, everyone was polite enough to say 'that's a lot better!' but their eyes betrayed them! I knew I was terrible. Period.

But still, was it fun. After an excruciating hour of feet-stammering and awkward dance moves, we headed back to the main club/dance area where people have already occupied all corners of the room. The fashion show then began soon after, and personally, I had awesome time mocking. I found it all amusing, because well, granted they were all dance clothes, but boy, were they skimpy!

Under the segment 'Glamour', models were wearing glittery dresses which suffocated their boobs and made half of their whatnot come out. Hmm. Glamour?

But during the intermissions between the fashion shows, the dance floor was open for anyone who wanted to show-off their skills. They were so intimidatingly good. I can't tell whether they're dancing or doing acrobats, for goodness' sake. One minute her head was on the floor, the next he threw her body up, and don't get me started on the tricks and turns! The really good ones made the dancing look so effortless!

Me? I wasn't drunk enough to do any of that! I simply sat there, amazed. I was enjoying the music and the crowds, and I thought, I have done enough damage for today. Hello? Traumatizing those poor guys, my dance partners? Probably the best decision I've had in weeks.

Nervous wreck

I am extremely nervous. I'm quite astonished that I get to be this tense, which means that subconsciously this must be pretty darn important.

I know I want this, but I can handle rejections. I will be dissapointed, but at least it's me, it's easier to handle. But my dad and my sister are having high expectations of me, and it's harder to dissapoint them. Bless them, they think I'm miss smarty pants, when in fact, I'm just more like, miss pants.

I know there is the other option, and I was so excited about the prospect. I thought that's what I'm gonna do for sure. And then this came along, and I realized that I want this more. It totally blew the whole equivation.

What was I thinking? Writing about what makes you nervous probably isn't a good idea to calm your nerves.

for you. on my own.

It has been such a ride, and I'm grateful for your presence. You've been there, and that's all I could ever ask. I know we both said we're gonna do this, and that, but it's not like I haven't been here before. It's okay, we don't have to. Everything has to end eventually, right? I've kinda seen it coming anyway.

What's important is, that we had memories to share, stories and pictures to remember our time, and that's it. Why ruin a perfectly good moment with expectations and speculations? And I hate falling out; making promises we can't keep. It's better to just get everything out in the open, clean and simple.

So I said, "It's okay," and you said, "Yes." I smiled and you concurred. Now even though it sucks, and hurts a little, it's alright. What's worse is getting upset when we fail to do whatever we're supposed to. Let there be tiny individual you, and tiny individual me, and let's not get in the equivalent.

When there's time, we can catch-up, fill in the silence and the seemingly growing chunks of space. Afterall, the most exciting things are those unplanned for. Spontaneousity. Unexpected.

It's gonna be fine. I keep telling myself that.

Being Unlikely

When you're a gemini, it's easy to make excuse when you behave a little out of the ordinary. "Hey, I'm a gemini, I have split personality," you would say, as if that explains everything. Duh? But when you're a Capricorn like me, and you act differently, suddenly people think you've lost it. What's signs got to do with all of this? (You will be surprised how some people do take this seriously.)

Yesterday was one of those days of change, but unfortunately, I couldn't blame it on the signs. First of all, I managed to arrive quite flawlessy to a foreign place for a job interview. It didn't hit me at all until the manager asked how I got there (by train and I had to take a bus too), and remarked, "Not by cab? Wow, that's impressive."

The idea of people complimenting my navigational skill is a foreign to me as the Artic continent. Highly unlikely.

It was a great interview, and a rather unconventional one, because we had it after office-hour, and I had to rush back to catch..eh wait for this, my yoga class.

I don't normally work out. At all. Period. Sweating makes me incredibly moody and bitchy, and I simply lack the motivation. But since last week, I committed myself to take these yoga classes and I really enjoyed it. Highly unlikely.

But I think this last one is the most surprising, especially for my sister. I hate walking. Okay, not hate, just lazy. I am one lazy bum. I would take a bus everywhere if I could, even if I just wanna go to a place one or two stops away. (Heck, I would take a bus from my room to the living room, if that's possible.) I'm too lazy to walk to Chinese Garden MRT even though it's only a 10-minutes walk, and would rather wait and take a bus to Jurong MRT (which takes longer, and the train is always almost full by then.)

The yoga class made my whole body hurt, but I still felt recharged and excited, so I decided to take a walk. Yeah. I walked to this DVD rental to borrow movies, and this place is like, 6 or 7 stops away, which is not that far by bus standard, but quite a distance if you walk.

I don't know if it was the cool air, the after-yoga effect, or simply me, but suddenly I just had the urge to walk and sweat. I was completely restless. Imagine my sister's surprise when she called me along the way.

"Wait, you're walking back?!!!"

"Yeah, I am."

"But why???" she said, as if I had suggested her to chop her ear.

"Just feel like it."

"Sis, are you...okay??? Are you sick??? Are you feeling okay??" She might as well say, 'Who are you and what have you done to my real sister?' I have to say I was quite wounded.

I convinced her that I was okay, but she still sounded worried and skeptical. This is what happened when you have been lazy your whole life.

I was feeling okay, though. It was weird, when I got back, although it was already almost 11 pm, I swore I still felt like hitting the gym and sweating it out more. But if I do that, I think my sister would really think I'm some alien invading her sister's body and start doing exorcism on me or something.

Have you ever had one of those odd days when you behaved totally unlike yourself? I would be interested to know, do share your thoughts on this and tell your story if you want :)

As for me, I blamed it on my period. Hormones can make you do weird things.

This great hotel website

Movers and shakers of the world!

(Isn't that an empowering opening or what?!)

Some of you are probably wondering (or not), about this big banner right here on my right. Why am I suddenly putting a travel site?

I used to have a lot of family vacations when I was growing up, and it's something I would never trade for anything. The whole experience makes up my childhood, and even though I don't remember much about watching transvestites' shows in Bangkok, crossing the river to Hongkong, and feeding kangaroos in Sydney, I knew we were all there, and everytime we got together, snippets of funny stories from those trips never ceased to make us laugh.

It has been so long since we have one of those family trips, it's harder now to get all of us together now that we're busy with our own things. The next chance we get, it's gonna happen for sure. My dad has been working too hard, and what for? What's the point if he can't even enjoy himself? Take a break once in a while?

The last trip that I've gone was that month-long trip to the States, and I absolutely loved it. It reminds me how much I love travelling in the first place. (also part of why I love The Amazing Race so much.) I think everyone should travel more, and see the world, because there's nothing like it, really.

So when you're all ready to conquer the world, there's still the issue of accomodation. When we already spend much on the plane ticket itself, we sometimes compromise on the hotels. But we shouldn't; it's one of the most important aspect of a trip, because you don't really want to share bathroom with 10 other people in a hostel, or worry about hygene for that matter. My friends and I spent a lot of time choosing hotels for our trip, because we wanted it to be cheap, but still good enough. We compared prices, locations, services from various sites and had to read many reviews before making our decision. It's a lot of hassle.

Well, that's why I'm putting this site here. I came across it the other day and I really wanna share it with you guys. They are offering affordable hotels rates in Asia Pacific region in just one site. Here.

From all around Asia to Australia, it's so easy to find whatever hotels you want under any budgets (from cheaper to more luxurious!) For each country, you can find list of specific locations, and the site will show you all hotels within that area that you want, complete with the map, photos, hotel details, and rates.

(For example, if you click Indonesia, you will be able to see all hotels from each province and island. It really doesn't get any easier than this to plan a trip anywhere.)

I also love the fact that in each location you choose, they provide background information and popular places in the area, which makes it even easier for us to know where to visit!

If I knew about this sooner, I would advise my dad to take a look before he went to Hongkong a few weeks ago. So yeah, I thought I'd share it here, and hopefully some of you find this useful. Here's the website again. Here. Take a look and be inspired. Ha! It certainly makes me wanna pack my bags and leave for Cook Island or something. (Saw that on Survivor!)

In that note, we definitely need a family vacation again.

On a separate note, hope you guys have a great day. I'm gonna blog more later on.

Room

I'm staring at this notebook-sized piece of paper, glued to the wall by cheap tape right in front of my desk, and feeling rather pathetic. I tore the paper out of a journal page, and wrote down dates under each column and called it 'a montly planner.'

Pathetic because, a) I can't even afford a nicer, bigger, and more catchy page to write down my plans in the month, and b) I don't have a proper board to put that on except the wall. The paper is so tiny that even with my super small handwriting, I can only write down probably a few words. Instead of putting down 'latest submission of student's pass application', I just wrote 'std pass.'

'Bring keys for appointment at Suites, 3.30pm', became just 'Suites'.

Pathetic.

I wanted to start being organized again because I'm just excited, really, to have school and things to do. I've had planners but it's not practical. Plastering it in front of my laptop desk is good to prevent me from forgetting anything, although I would like to be able to do more than just write 'curtain' to refer to the plan to compare prices and check out curtains for the new apartment this evening.

When I bought some new things for this room, I had wanted to really decorate it according to my taste and make it mine. I wanted to paint the wall with colour and the inside of the cubicles in which I put my books pink. I also thought of buying a big board where I could put planner, some pictures, memorable notes or buttons. A creative board, I'd call it.

But my 'dream room' has to wait for a little while. Unfortunately, this little piece of paper is all the creativity I've got for now.

The new look and the art of juggling [or the lack of it]

Tada! As you can see, I kinda changed my template for this website, do you notice anything different? Maybe the colour? The font? The size, perhaps? Anyway, I like it. A change right here and there is always good.

I still haven't been able to do the whole self-customized thing, so all I could do just change the template and play around with the font and colour. One day, I really should learn the HTML thing, it's definitely up there on the list alongside 'learn how to juggle'.

No, really. A few weeks ago I was out at a tennis court watching my family play, and the rest of us, the non-sporty ones, were goofing around with the balls, balancing and juggling them in the air. My aunt did it really well, so did my sister and her boyfriend. Well, they wouldn't win any trophies anytime soon, but they could at least make three balls fly in the air. What the *beep* yo?

I tried, for god's sake, I did. But balance is not my thing, and so is navigational skill. Some people just aren't gifted.

How could these people do it so flawlessy? When did it become something in the curriculum? Did I miss anything as a child? My ego was bruised, and I had to tell everyone I was so hungry so we could get out of there immediately. I felt exposed.

Afterwards I thought, juggling is essentially the same thing as multitasking. No wonder I suck at it. Yeah, I was a top student and I won english contest but ask me to write while listening to music, and I wouldn't be able to come up with a single readable sentence. Seriously. That is weird.

So now you know that I can't juggle to save my life, and that I can only work and study in complete silence. Not that these facts are gonna be useful to you in any way.

So anyway, I'm now getting back to my reading mood. I will finish 'The Lovely Bones' by Alice Sebold soon (very good!), and I want to keep going. So, if any of you have book recommendations, please, I will really appreciate it. If not, most probably I will try 'Angels and Demons' since I've seen the movie and in most cases, the books are always much better.

Well, this has been random. Thanks for reading and hope you like the new template too! Good night everyone.

weirdly inviting look?

My sister said my default face looks 'dumb' (thanks, sis, I love you too!), but it mustn't be the case. It must have looked either bored or strangely inviting.

The reason for saying this, and I'm all for science here, meaning everything must have a reason and cause, motive and evidence, is that I learnt about this particular, otherwise meaningless fact about my default face from an interesting chain of events I experienced yesterday.

I was waiting for friends at Bugis, and normally I like browsing around bimbotic magazines in the bookstore while waiting for someone, because just standing waiting, doing nothing seems too sad. But yesterday evening I wasn't in the bimbo mood; on the contrary, I was feeling excited to see Angels and Demons. So I just bought myself a drink, and stood outside. Doing particularly nothing and well, just waiting.

And this was when my default face must have occured.

Within 5 minutes, I was approached by a caucasian couple. From their hats, bermuda shorts and sneakers, I knew they must be tourists. But well, I guess I would have known anyway because of this:

"Excuse me, where is Bugis street?" the husband asked.

I got asked for directions from people and shameful to say, most times I couldn't even help because I possessed no sense of direction whatsoever. One time I even said, "Oh, I'm not sure, I'm new here," even though I have lived here for three-some years.

Shameful.

But yesterday it so happened that Bugis Street is actually just right opposite the road, so for once I smugly replied, "Oh yes, it's just right over there."

They thanked me as if I just saved their whole evening, and I basked in their gratitude. Ehm. Kidding. Of course I'm kidding. It's not a big deal at all. Just giving directions, no sweat.

[Hallelujaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!]

I continued sipping my peach milk tea when just minutes after after, two girls came over and introduced themselves.

"I like your contacts," one girl said, "I've been wanting to use contacts but my eyes are too sensitive."

They proceeded by the usual 'what's your name?', 'are you a student?' and 'are you waiting for someone?' questions before going straight to the point.

"Do you have facebook?"

I must have let out a giggle at this point, because the whole thing was just so funny and random. I told them that, yes, I do have facebook, and yes, I will [maybe..] add you, and yes, I will [a big maybe..] call them if I'm around the area sometime.

They thanked me for my time and friendliness, and I thanked them for, what? I don't know, it just seemed like the polite thing to say. Maybe they just wanna sell me something, and build up some kind of relationship first so I wouldn't say 'no' instantly. Who knows?

After they left, my friend still hasn't arrived yet, and I focused my attention to children playing around in the waterfountain. I always wonder why these parents would let their kids get soaking wet in the middle of the mall, but came up empty.

Suddenly a guy and a girl came approaching, and I simply couldn't believe this! What is it about me that screams "I'm bored! Come talk to me!" ?

After yet another introductionary round, [yeah, 22 is fabulous, but what's the point of the high-five?] he asked if I had time to do some surveys for his assignment.

"Sorry, as soon as my friend comes, we have to rush," I said, well, which is true. I pulled out my most apologetic face.

As soon as he left, I called my friend, feeling desperate, "WHERE. ARE. YOU?!!" Thankfully, my friend arrived just in time before the next insurance-seller, survey-taker, lost-tourists or just-plain-weird-girls come approaching.

Maybe I do have a weirdly-inviting default look. 'Dumb' doesn't seem too bad right now.

annoying neighbour

This morning, at exactly 9:10 am I was rudely and abrupty woken up by a drilling sound.

So much complaints that I can dig up just by reading that sentence, but first thing first: who the hell do drilling work at 9 in the morning?

It wasn't the loud, high-pitched, ear-piercing drilling sound, it was more like this low, consistent type of sound. Drill, nail, drill, nail, drill, nail. It was no less irritating.

Hey, renovating your home is perfectly fine, in fact, I'm encouraging it. If I had extra money I would love to redecorate this place too. But can you do that in a more humanly hour?

As we speak now, the drilling still continues. And I have kissed my bed goodbye because there's no way I can get back to sleep now. Dammit.

Nothing like family.

I love my family, that's a given. And they love me; they love me too much to the point that they can't stand seeing me alone, a woman on a certain age, unaccompanied by a gentleman, that is just too much to handle for these folks.

Especially since my little sister is way more mature than me these days. Her boyfriend is practically part of our warm yet slightly neurotic big family now. But of course, we are friendly, welcoming people, and we're happy for each and every additional unsuspecting poor innocent fellow that we can get.

"Get him to come, and watch me play tennis!" my uncle said, hafly ordered, referring to my sister's boyfriend. I'm sure there were at least fifty-one other things he would rather do with my sister on a Saturday night than to watch my uncle try to maul a tennis ball, but he couldn't say no to that, could he?

Ah, yes, welcome to the family.

So, last week I was at my aunt's house and a few of my uncles were there too. It's just part of our usual gathering, 'cos my aunt has this amazing karaoke machine and I was pretty much migrating there everyday to fully utilize it. The house has never been that loud before. (they should have never given me the microphone.)

Anyway, the conversation quickly turned to me, and as any other families, they started questioning the logic behind my nonexistential boyfriend. Soon enough they decided to take matters into their own hands and do what they know best: playing matchmaker.

Uh-oh.

"You know, Tin, I know someone at work who has a young son who just got back from his studies at America. He doesn't know that many people here, I think it's a good idea to introduce him to you?" uncle #1 began.

As if unwilling to get overshadowed, my other uncle also mentioned about his wife's sister's son who happens to be in Singapore too, and who is, according to him, "really handsome", "smart", and "rich."

"I am absolutely positive that you would think he's handsome too!" he passionately declared. But of course, I was skeptical, he and I don't exactly share the same taste in men, I am pretty certain about that.

He then called his wife to tell her about his genius plan of making up a letter for this "very handsome" guy which they would give to me for him to take when I get back to Singapore. He deliberately explained this as if he has been planning about it for the last five years.

As everyone there cheered and approved, I sat there, thinking, 'whose family is this again?' while mentally visualizing choking my satisfied-looking uncle.

Yes, welcome to the family, this 'super handsome' fellow. I feel sorry for you.

Time.

I concluded that my current life is not worth blogging about, well, at least not for the past five minutes or so. I just took a bath, unless you wanna hear that in great details (like, what brand of soap did I use, or what color was my towel), I'd say you're not missing out on much.

So well, last night I went out for dinner with my uncle's family and the kids. First, it hit me just seeing how bigger and older they've seem to become in the past few years that damn, time flies indeed. But then, I seldom see myself in that way. I mean, I had birthdays and all, and a brief, surfacing realization said that I was getting older, and I knew it at the time. I'm never big on birthdays anyway, kept telling myself it's just a number and it didn't really mean a thing.

But, shockingly I became acutely aware that I am twenty-two now. Today one of my best friend turns twenty-three. I have former high school friends who are already married with kids. Real kids, not like pets or anything. Real breathing, tiny-human-kids. I mean, they're as old as me, no wait, as young. And here they are, being wifes, and hold on for the scariest part: moms.

Anyway, my aunt was telling me all sorts of things about making the right decisions about men, what to look for in a husband, about how marriage is all about compromises and it's not always fun in the sun, that I felt like I've aged for about twenty years.

I'm not supposed to be thinking about it at all yet! Twenty-two is young, I wanna scream. Besides, there are other things I really should be worried about, like, oh wait, getting a job!

So perhaps yeah, I am getting older, and yeah, it's time to pull the responsible-act, but that doesn't mean that I'm going to grow alien in my tummy anytime soon. End of story.

Yeah, my little cousins are growing up to be little hearthrobs. In my absence, one has managed to outgrow me by a head, dropped his voice to a manly bass, and put up an air of coolness and 'I don't give a shit' attitude. I was like, "oh, don't give me that, I've seen you since you were only this size, running around in diapers." Oh, I love my cousins.

Another new thing I learnt while being home, is knowing my little sister's boyfriend. Those two are so cute you can't help but feeling affectionnetally jealous. (yeah, I think I made up that word.) Cruelly enough, this makes me feel so old as well. My little sister and her boyfriend have been going out for a year, seriously. But because she's my dearest sister, I'm willing to set aside my selfishness for a while, and I'm honestly really happy for them. What a way to restore my faith in love if those two can last, nothing beats the 'high school sweethearts' story.

I'm going to see another aunt and cousins now, and hopefully this time they won't make me feel like a Dinosaur.

24/7 Connected

I am loving the new Blackberry. Well, okay, it's not technically mine, in fact, it is not mine, I'm merely a temporary owner in this one. But hey, I treat it like it's my own, so don't I get credit?

It's not like I'm doing much of anything here, and man, isn't it great. For the first time I can really chill, be pampered and not worry about doing laundry or making up the bed. It's almost like a vacation, and not to mention, there is the never-ending food galore..

Anyway, back to the Blackberry thing. I'm now blogging through the computer, so it's alright. My previous entry was crap, cos I wrote that through the phone and well, it's crap, I had to delete it 'cos it was too sore for the eye.

But it's like being autist with this thing. You are almost constantly on the phone all the time, and what wasn't a need before, is now a need. You know what I mean? Like, why bother checking mail 24/7? Businessmen from ten years back are just as efficient as those nowadays, yet the constant demand for being on-the-go and reachable is too much these days. People invented mobile phone so they can be reached in emergency situations, but eventhough everyone's at home, nobody really calls through landline anymore.

And why would people want to be reached 24/7 anyway? So they can be worried about one hundred and one things on weekends?

Even with that said, why can't I get enough of this Blackberry thing, then? Maybe because everyone else is doing the same? That even when you're opposing it, you can't help but tagging along?

Well, I suppose it's alright doing that now, as long as you don't get addicted or anything. I like the phrase 'it's okay wanting things, as long as you don't get pissed off when you don't get them'. You know? I'll be back to Singapore, being the technologically-retard that I am, and it's alright.

So. I'll see you at gchat? Or windows messenger? Or just give me your BB pin? =p