Saturday, 28 August 2010

..Must Come to an End.

You're off the hook. I've never really put much faith in all that "if you love someone, set them free" crap, as evidenced by everything I've done in my life up to this very moment, but I am determined to be happy. Happy in this life. And I love you. I mean, I always-- I have always, always loved you. But our timing has just never been right. And the way I figure it, time is no man's friend. So I have to get right with that and be happy, now. Because this is it. I mean, this is all that we get.

Actually, um, hold on. I'm not done yet. Because I also want for you to be happy. It's really important for me that you be happy. So I want you to be with someone. I want you to be with someone who can be a part of the life that you want for yourself. I want you to be with someone who makes you feel like I feel when I'm with you. So, I guess the point to this long run-on sentence that's been the last 10 years of our lives is just that the simple act of being in love with you is enough for me. So you're off the hook.

You know, for the record, I-- I don't want to be let off the hook. Because everything in my life that I've done has led me here... right now, and the last thing I want, need, or deserve is to be let off somebody's hook.

I love you. You know that. And it's very real. It's so real that it's kept me moving, mostly running from it, never ready for it. I can't be let off the hook because I might just get the notion that it's ok to keep running.

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