Wednesday, 23 December 2009

2009 New Year's Resolution Conclusion

So these were my 2009 new year's resolution which I wrote last year. I remembered writing it after I got back from the States, feeling slightly depressed about being back here with no immediate plan in mind. I wrote what I was feeling at that time, what I needed to change, what mishaps I could have done and learnt from them. Anyway, let's see if I've somehow managed to accomplished most of these.

I will try not to worry and think too much about everything in life. I tend to over-analyze and get paranoid over the small stuffs, so I really need to learn not to sweat over the tiny bit of details, and just enjoy the ride.

I'd like to think that I've gotten better at this. At least, I knew when I was freaking out, and I just tried to calm myself up. This year has been particularly tough on me, and it's easy to just feel useless over the situation. I learnt it the hard way, and I think if you follow my blog, you would realize how much I've complained about this. At the same time, I tried to remain positive and not lose hope. And I think I'm in a much better place right now, and I intend to keep it that way. I'm grateful for the lesson, because it has reminded me to be a much more patient person. "Good things come to those who wait." Remember that.

But not thinking too much doesn't mean not thinking at all, because I'm whole-heartedly aware that I have made many mistakes in the past due to the fact that I simply did not think before I acted. People have been telling me that I possess absolutely zero sense of danger, and that's how I lost my brain sometimes. (e.g: drink too much beyond my capability, unable to say 'no', receive drinks from strangers, and et-cetera et-cetera) So, I should be more careful and take these things more seriously!

I have definitely learned to take care of myself, instead of depend on others to do so. I've gotten more serious and tentative, skeptic at times. In some circumstances, being skeptic isn't always a bad thing.

I will not drunk-dial my ex-boyfriend again, well, I guess that one is pretty personal, no explanation needed. Ha! At least I got one point right! Nah, I think I'm ready to let it go.

It's definitely accomplished. I haven't talked to him in ages, much less drunk-dialled the guy. It's also a very good sign, because one, I'm over it, and two, I'm not making a bigger fool out of myself.

I will not drink tequila again, simply because there has been too many drunken episodes caused by this little bugger, and it doesn't even taste good! Unlike Jargerbomb, which I'm totally hooked these days! (Although you probably don't need to know that!)

I will not have alcohol offered by a guy before going out, no matter how cute he is. Back in Oklahoma, I went out with this guy, and the context wasn't even a date, because I brought along another friend. He was picking us up at our room and I thought once he arrived, we could just go out straightaway, but he told me he wanted to come in first, so he did, and he pulled out a bottle of whisky from his pocket and we ended up finishing the whole bottle before even heading out! Bad, bad, bad guy! Stupid, stupid, stupid me! Couldn't really blame the guy entirely 'cos I played along. (see what I mean about being stupid and not thinking before acting?)

*Chuckle* Well, I do drink tequila still, on certain occasions. (Maybe it's not a good idea to swear off something before you really mean it) Drinking with caution is not a bad thing, is it?

I will find a fulfilling, permanent job! And the point here is fulfilling because I don't want just any jobs. Granted I may not get exactly my dream job straightaway, 'international correspondent', just because it's way too ambitious, (I'm a dreamer but even dreamer has to go back to reality sometimes) I shall seek and explore any other opportunities. Speaking of job, I have just finished my resume...I think! Clap!

Well.. That is covered, for now.

I will be a better friend because friendship means a tad lot to me, and I'm happy I made a lot of new friends last year, but as important is to keep the old ones. And I intend to do just that.

Who knew I was gonna find a really great friend at the start of the year? I'm really thankful for all the friends I have, those who stay, and those who invest in this friendship for as much as I do. They are the best.

I will spend more time with my family. During the course of the past few years, I just realized (it just hit me), that family sticks together no matter what. In fact, they probably are the only ones who won't ever leave. Well, I hope it's not only because of obligation. I have great family, everytime I come back home, I'm constantly reminded of that simple but most of times, taken-for-granted fact. For the resolution, though, I'm starting something simple; spending time with my sisters. Meli is coming to Singapore for her undergraduate study and I definitely want lots of bonding time...even if it's over a game in playstation, knowing her.

Yes. I think I've accomplished that too. My little sister is already here too, and now we spend as much time together as we can, during weekends especially. I'm really glad I have the most amazing sisters!

I will not get too drunk and pass out. Oh my god, so many memories come flooding back. No more any of that! No more throwing up and passing out in public. No more waking up and going like 'what the hell happened?' No more dialling up my friends for vivid details of the events leading to my unconscious state. No more being so embarrassed of seeing people who have witnessed more things than they have bargained for in the eyes. A lot more things. Dammit.

Check!

I will maintain my weight. 48 kg, no more, no less. Well, it probably could go down a little bit seeing how chubby I am, but definitely not more. This arm, right here, has got to go, though.

Okay, this one is a big failure. Not only have I been gaining weight, I'm also ballooning at an uncontrollable rate at the moment. There's no stopping it!

I will not have anything to do with the boy from the seventh floor anymore, simply because I don't want anything out from it, so what's the point? Out of impulse these days I always look up and check on his window to see if his lights are on, and that freaks me out; the fact that I appear to be a little on the stalker-side. And everytime I go down on the lift, I'm anxious that I may bump into him, it's just too weird.

What boy again???

I will read more books and watch more movies.

This is a definite yes. Books and movies are what keep me sane. Can't get enough of 'em.

I will buy myself a new phone, and this has really got to happen. My current phone is ancient, ugly, and friends complain that they often can't reach me, that somehow by miraculous reasons they go straight to mail box. It's time to change this thing I call my handphone, baby.

Yes! I've changed my phone to LG Secret which I have had since probably March. Absolutely loving it and so far it's been treating me good. No more complaints about not being able to reach me. Mission accomplished.

Lastly, I will involve myself in more positive activities, meet more people and not limit my preferences.

Ummm... Well, I am working, so that's definitely a positive activity, right?

Yes, yes, I need more challenging goals for next year!

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