Previous writings

"The B-Day in Progress"
December 22, 2007

So I’ve finally lived through today to tell you the story, and I’m grateful to say that no heads were chopped, or worse, no surprises were thrown because I mentioned before that I just wanted the day to go by without any events and I still meant it.

Yesterday was a meaningful day for me in all its meaninglessness. No birthday cakes, no cheesy songs, no water splashing, no gifts-wrapping-parade, and quite frankly, I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.

To me, it was still quite an emotional day and I didn’t exactly know why. I wasn’t planning on growing any older because I haven’t felt like I was ready to, yet. To be honest, I intended to just sleep through the day so I had the excuse to stay in bed and hide from the world. But the plan was clearly shattered when at 6 am my brother woke me up and led me out of my room, down the stairs, and into his room to congratulate and give me present. Which, I was deeply grateful, despite what I had in mind earlier.

But after that, I realized that at the very least I owed everybody a cheerful face. And why would I want to hide from my own family, anyway? They wouldn’t start throwing petals and arranging party in the backyard if I didn’t want to.

So I took a bath, and got kisses and hugs from everyone in the house and I felt my mood started to lift up. It was even quite endearing when I sat with my dad in our usual morning spots, and he suddenly laughed out loud and exclaimed, “Ah! Is it today?” as if he just
remembered that it was indeed his precious middle daughter’s big two-one birthday.

It’s not that I don’t appreciate all the greetings from my friends because I truly do. But I just wanted nothing for my birthday, and that is the truth. No, I wasn’t depressed or anything. I wasn’t feeling suicidal, if that’s what you’re asking. I just didn’t want anything, seriously. Ah, okay, I honestly wanted the sexy hot red Samsung camera, if you insist.

So after I insisted my friends that ‘no, you don’t have to come over’, and ‘no, don’t tell everyone’, I sat cozily in the couch with a book in my hand and no one in the house and I was happy enough.

Anyway, we have this tradition of eating out in a fancy steak restaurant whenever a family member is celebrating birthday and so, just to end the day with a nice round to it, I agreed and gathered dad and sisters to the place to honor the old ritual. It was a perfect ending to a perfect day that was my birthday. I think this is the most low-key birthday ever.

Ah, okay, so the picture that I painted in your mind isn’t entirely accurate. There were some cheesy songs. But hey, they weren’t that bad. The singer at the restaurant sang a birthday album compilation consisting of ‘Happy Birthday’ in constant repetition and in two languages, ‘Tiup Lilinnya’ (Blow the Candles), and a nice ‘Panjang Umurnya’ (Long-Lasting Age(???)) piece to top it all off. Hey, thanks a lot. (I’m not being sarcastic! I truly appreciated the beauty and exquisite notes of those songs)

I’m always excited in planning surprises for my friends’ birthday, but never my own; which is weird in itself, because I usually like being the center of attention. Ha! But hey, I’m now legal and a hundred percent twenty-one, I have nothing to complain, I have everything I need..for now.

"Childish Memories"
December 30, 2007

Growing up is a funny thing. And let me tell you why.

You remember when we were small at how we all used to write things in our tiny little secretive journals? How we made everyone swear in the name of their most valuables that they would never take a peek into our diaries because oh, what we wrote was so scandalous and juicy? Yep, even when the most exciting thing in our lives that we could write about was our secret crush on the boy next door? No, not the gardener, this isn’t Desperate Housewives, please. Anyway, you know, that sort of thing?

Well, I was one of those people. Even as a child, I was a diary-junkie. I kept journals, in fact, a whole lot of them because I would get bored of writing in the same diary for a long period of time so after like, a month or so of writing almost everyday in the same book, I would get that itch to buy another one and start new in those fresh untouched papers and that’s the vicious cycle, ladies and gentlemen. I know, short attention span, right? Well, okay, so the old diaries (and every one of them all became old eventually) were always put to waste because they weren’t even full yet. Being somewhat of a geek, I’ve always loved stationary and the best shopping spree ever to me was buying sets of new colorful pens and organizers. Hey, there are a lot worse addictions out there, okay! Pens are so less harmful, and at least they’re cheap! My dad wouldn’t have headache this often if my obsession now is only limited to papers and pencils. So, anyway, I had up to ten journals and rereading all those entries again when I’m at least eight years older (much less-dramatic and more realistic, I hope) is amusing and embarrassing at the same time.

In addition to being an ungrateful spoiled little brat (for wasting papers and therefore, contributing towards the early stage of global warming, noooo!), I was also a complete list-freak. I would make a list of everything I could possibly make a list out. And I couldn’t just do that in mind, I had to write them all and perhaps I did that because I just loved to write too much so everything I felt had to be written down, I don’t know. Or maybe I was just simply a freak who has some kind of compulsive disorder. Well, anyway, I re-opened all my journals, and the oldest that I could find was from 1999 and I couldn’t believe how funny I sounded! I listed everything, from all the books I owned (as if I would take another look at it), magazines, cassettes, favorite film characters, television shows, and oh geez, I’m so ashamed, top three guys whom I wanted to marry, the contenders being Joshua Jackson, David Duchonvy and Robin Dunne. *can I dig my hole now?*

I wrote all sorts of ridiculous things, and when I said ‘ridiculous’, you better believe me. But reading all of these reminds me at how naïve and free and innocent I was. Okay, maybe not so innocent since I have been thinking of marrying someone when I was only, what, 12?

I guess in a way I forgot about that. I forgot about the way I used to be, the way I used to think and write, the way I used to feel. I forgot the time when I was so crazy towards The X-Files (okay, David Duchovny in specific), and Joshua Jackson, and Hewitt the tennis player, and Seifer from Final Fantasy, and Brian from the Backstreet Boys; I forgot the time when I was so obsessed with comic books and Sweet Valley novels; I forgot how nauseatingly girly I got when I had crush on the boy next door (seriously, he has the fairest thigh I have ever seen! Oops, not that I have seen a lot. How could I get to take a look at his thigh? Oh chill, it was a coincidence, he just happened to appear in shorts when I happened to drop by to his house, okay, Completely and utterly coincidental. Geez, I was 17.) I had a lot of funny thoughts that I expressed in writings and now, some years later I found them all really amusing, like somehow, I couldn’t believe it was me who wrote all those silly things and felt those silly thoughts.

But funnily enough, now that everything is coming back to me, I could picture myself at that time. I remembered that once, watching the latest episode of Party of Five seemed like a matter of life and death to me. All those comic books used to be so important and even though I couldn’t put a finger as to why I could get so engrossed to them in the first place, I knew that at one time, they were pretty darn vital. I could still feel that despite not being able to relate anymore.

It seemed like a long time ago but then again, maybe not so much. I guess I can still be that dramatic sometimes, it’s just the subject of my obsession is more justifiable now. Is it, really? Well, it’s funny that no matter how older you become, deep inside you’re still the same. I mean, okay, so I was obsessed with comics when I was 14 and I’m not anymore, but do I still like comics? Sure, I still read comics from time to time, the difference is just if there aren’t any, I wouldn’t go looking for it, and I sure wouldn’t spend all my pocket money on them like I used to. And yeah, I might be crazily in love with Joshua Jackson and David Duchovny back in time, but do I still think they are good-looking now? Sure. I wouldn’t say, “Oh my goodness, they scared the beejezus out of me!” but I wouldn’t go around looking for their posters anymore. You know what I mean? Come to think of it, my interests are still the same, it’s just that the comic books are replaced by novels and television series with only bunch of good looking actors are substituted by movies and series with good dialogues and story lines. I would still watch Buffy and think that it’s good, but I wouldn’t think the world is going to fall on me if I miss just one episode. And I still like writing in colorful pens, it’s just I have so many leftovers I don’t feel the overwhelming urge to buy new ones just yet, unlike that time when I was in high school that I just kept buying and buying until my pencil case was the size of pregnant stomach of a cow and everyone in class could just borrow pens from me and I could still have enough to sell and use the money to buy candies to feed the entire third world countries.

It's an interesting realization, that's all. It's funny to remember yourself as a child and all that hyperactive behavior and crazy likes, and look at yourself now to find that despite all the drastic changes from the surface, you're still pretty much the same on the core. You know what they say, "we have this innate set points, nothing much happens to us changes our disposition."

"I'm Tired of Having One Foot Out The Door"
December 18, 2007

Since when have I gotten so scared of plunging into a relationship? It would make sense if I’ve had some awful traumatic experiences in the past, at least they could explain my current state of fear, but I’ve never been bruised, let alone traumatized. But even so, I have to admit that I am scared, with whatever reason there is that I simply can’t materialized.

I’ve never been in love, so I’ve never actually been hurt before. I’ve had some exclusive relationships and countless casual ones which didn’t necessarily involve feelings and commitments, even when I was in supposedly good monogamous relationships. But make no mistake, I’ve never been unfaithful. I tried to put myself out there for the other person to grab and I waited patiently for them to excite me, shake my world and sweep me off my feet, metaphorically speaking. In all relationships I was in, even though I might not get in for the right reason in the first place, but I tried. I might not have enough feelings for them to begin with, but I always hoped that it could change, that eventually feelings could grow somehow. So I stayed there, doing whatever a good girlfriend is supposed to do: talk to him every night, walk home together after school, keep him company during weekends, support and take care of him, listen to all his stories and be there for him when he’s upset. I don’t know if that is even right, but I was willing to be a part of someone else, to be referred to as Tina and (boyfriend) instead of just me, and receive only one invitation to friends’ party as a couple instead of two separate individuals. I was even looking forward to a day when I could really see my then-boyfriend and feel that overwhelming rush of love and joy because he’s mine and nothing else seems to matter. But the day never came, of course, and the feelings-can-grow-philosophy is even more doubtful to me now than ever.

But I don’t know why. Those guys have always been very nice and great. They were caring and affectionate and it seemed like they adored me a lot too; which is supposed to be enough, no? Apparently I was and probably am a jerk for creating illusion as if I cared so much about them as well. Which I, in all honestly, did not.

And I wish I can tell them how sorry I am, because I really thought given enough time, I would finally fall for them and everything would just be great as both of us wanted to. But it was never the case. Because within months, I grew bored and tired of them altogether. I tried to shake the feelings, to assure myself that every couple is bound to experience the same feeling at some point of the relationship, I tried my hardest to justify myself that it would only be a temporary glitch in my part and that soon enough things would go back to normal. So I ignored the boredom and stuck to my end of the bargain. I prolonged the ‘us’ and I was back to being someone else’s girlfriend for some more weeks. Nobody else knew that I was relieved whenever I put down the telephone after talking to him for hours, or that sometimes I made up excuses not to go out on weekends.

But after more time, I soon found out that the boredom wouldn’t just go away and that the longer I waited, the more sick and annoyed I was towards him, his possessiveness, his jealousy and attentiveness and his continuing public display of affection which shouldn’t have bothered me in the first place if we’re talking about a normal girl instead of me.

As far as romance goes, that’s the typical story of my life. I’ve never restrained myself for relationship longer than four months. And I suppose the boredom started to kick in way sooner than that. But the thing that matters to me, and I hope all my past boyfriends know, is that I tried. I really did. I would never be in a relationship altogether if I didn’t. It just hasn’t worked out exactly as I wished.

Ever since my last exclusive relationship when I was 17, I simply haven’t been bothered anymore. I presumed I was young and free so there was no need to be with someone, even.

I was in that state for two years, broadening my view and opening myself as exchange for interesting bits and opposite stories from people, listening and finding out each and every persons’ personalities, their opinions and views, their liking and preferences, their families and cultures, and so many other details. Throughout those times, I made a lot of new friends and whole set of various stories to tell.

I haven’t been particularly thinking about relationships during that period because I was enjoying my freedom too much. But in the midst of some meaningless flings and romantic encounters, two in particular stood out because they were the nearest to an almost relationship. But again, story of my life always repeats itself. It began great, and there was this boredom and tiredness and ongoing irritation. So I let it go.

I don’t see any reason why I should be scared, but I am. I have always been a little terrified of commitment. I realized that many times I made excuses not to be with someone I liked because I kept telling myself that I would miss out on something, that perhaps, a better person would come along, or that I would be this boring person that don’t go out anymore because my boyfriend wouldn’t let me. Now that I think about it, maybe the one thing I’m not ready to lose is my own freedom. I like the feelings that I can go out whenever I like with whomever I want. There is always a part of me that can’t imagine how I would be like with a boyfriend, when I’m not referred as simply Tina, the free soul.

But I wonder how long this will last, because I'm starting to get tired of it. Tired and bored of this altogether, maybe it's the case of too much too early.

Gosh, I've never thought about that before. Writing it out really gives me perspectives.

Nothing Anymore

What's the purpose of words if you don't act on it? People can say anything their stomach feels like saying, the hell it doesn't make it true. I hate second guessing and expecting those people to come to their senses and please make good use of their brain and have the balls at least to admit that they've done wrong, or for goodness' sake, don't say anything in the first place at all. The world will be a much better place for the rest of humankind.

They told you they cared about you and you chose to believe them because you didn't know better and you're still a fucking idealist. Then they went awol and you were left with questions and more questions and you grew anger and anger by the day. You started to curse your own foolishness for trusting them in the first place. To you, promise was promise but apparently to others it was nothing more than sequence of words meant to create an illusion and make other people feel good at that time but ask them again the next day and they wouldn't know what you're talking about.

And you were starting to accept and forget. It was a mistake you made and that's all there was to it. A mistake. Maybe things were never meant to be perfect, and mistakes were bound to happen so you could truly appreciate the better that comes afterwards. Your blood boiled everytime his name was mentioned, but it was an accomplishment. At least you didn't cry your eyeballs out again, and you didn't feel unbeareably insecure anymore. Yeah, there were times when you were just angry at yourself, for not being able to make him stay, and for probably doing or saying something wrong, but then fuck. You would spend your life questioning yourself if you allow your mind to think that way, because it wasn't your fault. You've done this much and even if you've given them the moon or the mountain, they probably would still leave, you know.

So you've gotten past that and you were finally okay. But the experience stayed and you learnt from it. No words and sweet promises are necessary, there is no need for romantic and exaggerating compliments, all you want is for them to show you through the little things everyday.

You laughed and lived. And then suddenly they were back. They were back from wherever they have gone to, probably from hookerhood, and they expected you to feel the same, to response and act as if nothing has ever happened. They seemed genuinely shocked to find that you were fucking pissed when all you wanted to do was strangle their necks and stabbed them with that knife Sweeney Todd used. They tried to explain and they simply said they were in no state to keep in touch over that time, that they were bad at it and they never meant to hurt you. Oh, some guts they had.

"You'll see that a match like us doesn't come often", they said. Maybe not, but you'll live with that. You refused to put yourself out there again for them and once is enough. They tried to convince you with all their might, but to you, it was nothing but words. You hated how bitter and skeptical they made you feel, but that's the way it is. You trusted the wrong person and you couldn't see everyone with such innocence anymore.

But that's okay because none of it matters. You are simply tired now. It shouldn't be this hard, you know. The amount of hope and expectation they have built; the sweeter their words of affection, the worse you'd feel when they let you down. So you don't need that anymore. You would rather keep everyone on mute and so hopefully you'd know which one is genuine. They said they weren't giving up, that they would make it up to you somehow, that they 'tried' to ring you a lot of times, they 'tried' to send you flowers on your birthday, well the hell with that. What's the use?

You aren't angry, maybe angry is not the right word. You can talk to them in straight tone, you can look up and say what you have in mind in decent and polite voice. The anger has passed, and you realized it has done nothing good for you. So you are just...being indifferent. What you have with them now is nothing but a memory, and you intend to keep it that way. You probably can still be friends. But the possibility of something more has left. And for the first time, you are okay with that.

On Saturday

Okay, there are good and bad news. Which one would you rather hear first? The bad? Geez, you sure are a terrific friend, has anyone ever told you that? Put that in your resume, please, under 'Skills' - inflicting pain on people and enjoying seeing them miserable. I'm sure you will receive overwhelming calls, apparenty we're lacking of loansharks around here. Well, just one second into this and already I am making enemy. Please forgive me, I'm in no state of thinking logic. I am excited with a slight headache and a bad communication skills. Now if you don't mind, I'm going to start the real entry now.

Anyway, as you probably know (shame on you if you don't), I had my advertising exam yesterday and oh boy, oh boy, oh boy. Hah. Where should I begin? Hm. I can't decide, the part where I was staring aghast into the paper, the part where I was struggling so hard not to cry and make whimful sound, the part where I could smell horrified in the air, the part where I looked at others and quickly scribbled down incoherent letters on my sheet just to appear as if I had so much to write because my knowlegde on the subject was simply too much and overloading 'til I couldn't take it anymore I had to simply channel all these information or else! Which one? Which one! Bugger. I am so toast. I had all these notes heavy enough to kill, or if not, at least disable an arm of a burglar, and all those just materialized into a two-paper, ten-short questions! After ten minutes has passed and I was almost certain I wouldn't get struck by lightning or have one of those lightbulb moments, I made a whimful noise and pitied my whole existence in this planet. It's bad enough that I had flabby arms and frog-like thigh, I have to fail my subject too?? So what to do, I relied on my common sense. But don't start applauding yet. My common sense, as a matter of fact, is known to have shits for brain. So relying my whole future on my common sense which have proven more of its pathetic failures rather than its impressive achievements doesn't necessarily make me feel too convinced. But what happened has happened. I would like to thank everybody now for their supports and for believing in me, because after failing this exam, I probably would be kicked out of the college and house and I wouldn't afford to pay internet anymore, I would have to rummage through dustbins just to go to another ladies' night at zouk..For fuck's sake. Okay, you get the idea. It was a bad, bad afternoon.

But determined not to let that fact ruin my youth, I decided to go ahead and better my Saturday because quite frankly, it has gone down the hill by 1 pm. Yep, that must be a record. So late that night I headed out to MOS. I felt so much better a few glasses after. Ha! I was like, 'advertising what?!' Nope, no slightest recognition of the word 'advertising' there. Is it in arabic language or something? Because nope, I have never heard of it before in my life.


Had time to walk down and take pictures a bit. I hope you're not bored yet. Well, even if you are, just act interested, will ya. Anyway yesterday was so cold, I think it has been raining all evening so we were shivering our asses off while trying to look still presentable. I mean, look, I'm not that hairy but I look like a freaking hedgehog with all my hair standing up, okay! And please, do yourself a favor, do not imagine that. I wouldn't be responsible for you puking up your lunch.


Pretty, eh? I love the lights and the river. It was a chilly night but a great chilly one alright. We asked some people to take our pictures here and we tried to look for those with convincing faces, you know, like the faces of people who could hold the camera still for two seconds and not make us look like we're on a moving train or jogging somewhere to the sunset? Some guys looked damn convincing but they took the initiative to use the ZOOM option without consulting us (eer) so there were just our faces in the entire frame! And I would pat him on the back and call him 'dude' on normal circumstances, but the background was so damn nice, okay, I wanted it to be included in the picture. In the end, we reluctantly asked for an old auntie's help (but we were rolling our eyes and expecting the blurriest pic yet) and she took this picture! Okay, so we shouldn't judge a book by its cover. Okay. Got it. Sorry, auntie.


We just had to take pictures in the ladies. It's a must do. It's in the handbook. Which handbook? Well. I have to get back to you on that.








The lights are pretty cool, eh? Although, why did it have to strike me right on my eye?!

Okay, past the party, I would like to talk about something else here. I'm so excited now! My sis and I are going for this buffet dinner at Rendezvous Hotel and it's going to be so fabulous. Not just the dressing up part, I assure you, although I'm not complaning either. But will definitely take loads of pictures there.

Ah, and another good news is I have forced leave from the office this week due to chinese new year, so I'm free to be a pig! No irritating alarm clock at 6 am in the morning, no disturbance on my sleep right where I was almost kissing John Cusack in my dream. Bugger. That was close. Our lips were only 5 cm apart and then bang! bang! Suddenly there was this loud childish music (like in the circus) and I was snapped back to reality where John Cusack is simply unattainable. Bugger bugger bugger. So frustrated! Damn you childish alarm clock!

I'm going back to Jakarta this upcoming Thursday to collect my angpao. Hehe. No, really, I'm going back but not because of that reason, okay. I'm excited to have homemade cookings again, my favorite fried mushroom, wait for me, darling, I'll be right there in a few days.

On other notes, I saw Sweeney Todd last Thursday and I was so disturbed by it. And my friend's laughing wasn't helping either, okay. So I was scared of blood, but it was pure sadistic. Even though I shutted my eyes during the massacre part, I still could hear the sickening sound of people's whimpering when their necks were being cut open. I still could hear the sound of blood splashing in all direction and oh my god. Okay, I'm not going to relieve that moment. There's a reason why I wouldn't want to watch horror, you know.

Just another picture where we went for great karaoke session. We are so chinese, eh? =p



Okay, I think I better get ready now. Yeay! Buffet! Food! Sushi! Salmon! Advertising what??? I am sooo moving on. Yeah, until I receive my result slip. And then I will piss my pants off. -__-'

Walk

Just two days of work and I'm thinking of quitting already! I am a spoiled little brat! Okay, no, I'm not going to quit, but man, waking up at 6 every morning, dang! By now my feet are bruised everywhere and my pride is even worse, I call myself a woman?! By the way, the bruises are caused by hells, not by the waking-up-early-part. I mean, seriously, I would really freak out if that's the case, what, you think what am I doing in my sleep?! Just to paint a picture, my office is in Tanjong Pagar, I have to take bus from here to the train station, and from Tanjong Pagar I still have to walk for another 15 minutes or so to reach the office, so yeah, feet are quite the victims here. But ah, I love the feeling of walking home though. Cos it's late by that time and the weather is just perfect. And you feel so relieved finally getting through the day that you just want to skip rather than walk. Maybe that's just me.

Okay, what else. I just watched Sweeney Todd with J and 2 of his friends, who couldn't speak english, so basically it was like in the mute show.

And yeah! I have forced leave from tomorrow til next week so I'm free to wake up late for a while! Finally! But I have Advertising exam on Saturday, so tomorrow I must study, gosh. Anyway, I'm feeling anything but creative now, I'm beat! I'm going to hit the sack, cheers!:)

Busy Looming Ahead

Yes, this is Monday and reality sinks in. Which is,
(1) I got the job as an intern in a marketing specialist company.
(2) I start working on Wednesday.
(3) Working hour is 8.30 - 6.30
(4) My Advertising make-up exam is this Saturday!

I can feel my youth pass me by. There, it passed.
Welcome to the real world, baby.

What a Week.

I have been hibernating for months and now that I started functioning as a normal human being like the rest of you, I fell into great exhaustion. Brilliant, don't you think? What am I, 70?! The truth is, I think I just need some getting used to, plus I am still not a morning person. And I think public transportation sucks. Once you rely on 'em, bang! They look away and turn you down, simply left you bruised and traumatized for life. And when you start believing in them again, they would bang! Crash your intestines this time, haven't you learnt anything from the last time? I had my inside crushed a few days ago when I was waiting patiently with faith for the 198 bus. The time showed 8 am. You think most people would have been still in stage-four sleep (I've been learning too much psychology) and stage four means you're in deep deep shit, oops, I mean sleep. But of course I was wrong (I seemed to get everything wrong lately) and when the bus came, it was apparent that we were no longer in a healty relationship, no symbiosis-mutualism, and that 'it' has turned its back on me, literally. The bus didn't even stop, it just simply passed, leaving me with paranoid thoughts and I spent the rest of the day wondering 'where did I go wrong?' It wasn't enough that I had just been dumped by a dead-object, when the second bus arrived ten minutes later, the exact same thing happened. It was nearly 8.30 then and I was already having extravagent rage and temper tantrum. I wanted to flag a cab down real bad but even then, I still thought about how great of a relationship the bus and I have had over the years and I was just confused, why? Why? Although my heart had been bruised, I convinced myself that there must have been an explanation, so I allowed myself to believe in it once again. Sometime after 8.30, finally the bus and I made up. It apologized and I forgave. So it took me to school, but it was too late and I missed my quiz, but at least we got back together again and what doesn't kill you just makes you stronger.

Now, just forget everything that I said in the last 5 minutes, okay?

Great, now I feel better. I just slept for nearly 12 hours and it was the best sleep in days. For once, I didn't wake up with massive headache and hallucination. Science says you can't have lack of sleep and just make up for it in weekend, meaning I can't have four hours of sleep on weekdays and twelve hours on weekend to compensate for it because our bodies don't work like that, so if one day I suddenly collapsed or anything, at least you would know why and not be too surprised. "Ah, I've seen it coming, that girl has been abusing her body by making it work OTT everyday and not even giving it salary." But don't you know that our brain is most active when we're asleep? Our body is resting but the brain is the complete opposite, I think that's why I constantly have this excessive imagination and dramatic over-the-top ideas. Because I simply sleep too much. Hmm, I don't know how I feel about that. I guess that's a good thing? Hmm?

Aside from the getting-tired part, in a way I feel good because I start making my time useful and I actually do something other than partying and getting wasted, hey, speaking of partying......

I'm kidding. This last week has been very productive and I wrote more (although not here), that is, assignments and writing sample. And I actually reviewed things that have been taught in class at night (impressive, although the reason behind it is because of quiz, not because I have conscience) but the bottom line is the same, no?

The interview yesterday was fine, it wasn't a complete disaster like the other one, but again there were still things I wished I didn't say, ("Well, I take pictures just for fun because I'm very narcissistic, so no, I can't say I know photojournalism.." and "I like Sex and the City because of the obvious? The sex part?" just to mention two, believe me, I wished my mouth has a censor-board), but well the boss seemed not so appaled so who knows. He asked whether I had facebook all while clicking and tapping away in his laptop, I had a hunch he searched into my profile hoping to know more about my real personality. (Shit, all my partying pictures.......) On the bright side, yesterday I was simply too tired to care about my answer, I was definitely sleepy and I started seeing stars halfway through the cab journey to the office, but thanks to the damn talkative taxi driver, I managed to keep my eyes open with all the strength I could muster, so I was just happy to get it over with. No time to get nervous, once the boss settled me into his small office, I was talking and nodding (hopefully) all in the right places while struggling not to yawn. So I said it went well.

The trip back home was another story. Guilty for wasting too much money on cab lately, I decided to walk and took train instead. It was quite a distance from the office to the train station so I was already panting pathetically then. On top of that, I was wearing heels, and the sun was blazing it could set eggs to fry. I didn't feel sleepy anymore, yipee. The yawn has miraculously dissapeared and replaced by sweat and unglam face. I chose yawn everytime. Damn it. Took the train afterwards from Tanjong Pagar (which was where the office is) and alighted at Chinese Garden just to walk again to the flat. I swear it was the hottest day ever, and for once it wasn't because of me. (Ha!) My feet were killing me, my bag was so heavy (I went to the interview straight from school and you should see how thick my textbook is...And yes, why the hell is there school on a Saturday?!) I almost lost the feeling of my shoulder, and the heat was enough to set my temper right to boiling point. I was mad!

Nearing the apartment just when I was about to cross the street, some guy approached me. I looked at him deadly because he obviously kept me from my soon-anticipated-nap-of-the-year.

The-Guy-Who-Would-Have-Been-Sidekicked-If-This-Was-My-Dream: "Hi, excuse me.."
Me: "What?!"
The-Guy-Who-Was-Obviously-Slow-In-Brain-Department: "Um..Do you know.."
Me: "What?????!!!"
The-Guy-Who-Was-Apparently-Also-Slow-In-Language-Department: "Do you know where the nearest post office is?"
Me: "No."
The-Guy-Who-Had-Problem-With-His-Ear: "......."
Me: "No, I'm sorry, I don't know."
The-Guy-Who-Should've-Known-Better: "You don't?"
Me: (losing patience) "I. Don't."
The-Guy-Who-Should've-Shutted-Up-and-Walk-Away: "But don't you live around here?"

Seriously. What am I, a damn street directory? Mayor of the Town? A freaking postman?! Besides, what was his point anyway? I already told him I did not know, why should he go on and make an accuse as if I'm a bad citizen for not knowing where the post office was?!

Gee, if I was in another mood I probably would have helped him look for the pos office, all while holding hands and skipping, but I was in no mood of such. By then I was sure I must have had blisters all over my feet and looked like a zombie. Okay, I surely didn't make myself look appealing. But as you can already tell, I'm not a big fan of sweating and it makes me grumpy.

Yeah. I think I've described it pretty well. Far more than you wished to know. Or care.


Friday night, the previous day of the 'grumpy ol' me-scenario, which probably would explain why I was so sleepy. We were having late dinner (better known as supper) at Clarke Quay but something was missing: my energy, oohh where art you? I need some good old trashy shameless fun party. -__-'

And just for making this entry a bit more longer than necessary, we were chillin' at Starbucks where we occupied the best seats of all - the big couch nearest to the door overlooking the street, if you picture the Starbucks near Heeren (opposite Meritus Hotel) you would know what I mean.


Feeling quite 'super' that day. Because my class ends at 12.30 everyday, I feel like I have the entire day to do whatever, now I know why time usually feels so fast (yeah, because I wake up at 1 in the afternoon? Half of the day basically has passed while I'm sinking myself to further pig-doom.)

So long story short..(short? Are you kidding me?) I'm now enjoying a good old sleep, finally. Not now, technically I'm wide awake now, but I mean today. Tomorrow's another hard working day and I'm counting my 'lover' to not let me down. Speaking of tomorrow,..I have a paper I have yet to make, but I'm seeing Atonement this evening so I'm quite excited. Until next time?;)

News Flash

Okay, just a short post to let you know that I'm still here, not yet abducted by alien, unfortunately, sorry to dissapoint you. I'm just really busy with school these days, and it doesn't help that my classes are all in the morning. By the end of the lesson, I would have always been either: (1)halfy asleep, (2)halfly hallucinating or (3)halfly sleepwalking.

One time I only had two hours of sleep and I swear I couldn't remember waking up, taking a bath, alighting the bus, sitting for lecture, and going back home. All I remembered was being safely back in my room and sleeping for as long as this body's still warm. I think I was sleepwalking throughout the day.

But I'm young, I should have had more more energy than this, apparently my 'energy' has fleed somewhere to watch concert or whatever else, cos everyday I just feel the same fatigue and tiredness and I'm so ashamed to admit it!

Although school takes up quite some amount of time (with all the quizes everyday, homeworks, reading material, etc), but it isn't the only thing. I'm on the lookout for jobs and I've been in one interview yesterday (disastrous!) and another one tomorrow, I'm in the process of writing an article sample, and a whole lots of craps. I'm not feeling so good lately about some things lately.

So, yeah. I hope I can write more once this module is done. Until then, peace.

'Intelligent'???

Tomorrow I'm starting school...after months of brain absence. I feel so dumb you wouldn't believe it, my friend asked me what 9 times 2 is and I had to pause for a millisecond to answer. Now I'm officially freaked out. My intelligence is one thing I always boost about whenever opportunity arises.

Friend: Hey, isn't that our old friend from high school?
Me: Yes! I used to be a science student in high school!

Friend: Do you know what (this word) means?
Me: Yes, do you know I won speech competition back in high school?!

Friend: She looks so beautiful, don't you think?
Me: Maybe. Hey, I used to teach all my friends chemistry, math, biology, english!

Friend: How much is my change? (talking to herself, rather than to me)
Me: I'm very good with number. I was in science! Science! Science! Me! Yes, me!

I have to revert everything back to how intelligent I was, and still am! I won't let a silence go by without making that statement and hoping that it would make me look even brighter, sometimes I would even cut my friend's sentence...

Friend: Have you seen my b.....??
Me: (cutting her words) IwasasciencestudentandIwasinyearbookdesigncommitteandallteachersadoredme......!!! (in one long breath)

After that, my friend just looked me weirdly and she has never asked me out again ever since. I always thought she was just intimidated by my *what else, intelligence*, but come to think of it, maybe she just thought I was a loser beyond belief.

So imagine my horror when I couldn't even answer 9 times 2 under one second! This lack of brain's activity is scaring me way more than watching Ju-On and I was almost pissing myself then. I guess it's a good thing, then, that school starts tomorrow. And moreover, in the spirit of becoming a more responsible adult, I won't complain at how early I have to wake up every morning, at how irritating it can be waiting for a crowded bus, standing and being squeezed by people all the way to school, at how sweaty and hot the weather is after the lesson ends in midday...

Nope, as a maturing woman, you won't hear me mutter a single word of complaint about any of it.

On a lighter note! I just saw '27 Dresses' today and it was great! James Marsden is so ogle-able in it (is there such word?), I have always thought he's a cutie but in this movie, everything about him just feels right! In Enchanted, his hair is way too long, in X-Men, his eyes are constantly covered, and to me eyes are important! What else? In Hairspray, well, there is just simply too much hairgel..but he's definitely a catch in this one. Okay, past the James Marsden effect, the story is good and funny without being too dramatic.

Yesterday I went to Chinatown and had dinner at this sort of food court at Bukit Timah. I was craving for cockles and boy, didn't I get cockles. Look at that!



Fresh yummy cockles....cheese mushroom prata...and teh tarik. Okay, odd combination.

F had this fried cockles kway-tew and I have my eyes set on it for next time, hahaha!

Ramblings. What's New?

I have nothing to blog about these days, people. I'm young and alive (!!!) and the only interesting thing I can tell you is, that I have just been 'busy' in front of my pc trying to make sense of this facebook thingy, and dare I say it, failing miserably. What happened to Friendster? Why does everyone bug me to join facebook where I have to again, write introductionary profiles and 'about me' noone has ever read anyway, post pictures noone would ever pay attention to more than once, add yet another contacts and friends whom I already have in my Friendster account to begin with? God forbids, some 500 plus of them, to be exact?

But I'm not complaining, thanks to this thing, I actually have something to do! And I'm ashamed to admit it, but so far I'm not doing that good. See, I wrote in my own wall, I setted up all these applications which purposes were apparently lost on me, and my profile at the moment looks like I (a) have no social life, (b) have no friends, (c) am simply pathetic.

Aside from being so retardedly-challenged in technology department, I am doing good. I'm not such a mess anymore (like when I wrote that stupid emotional whatever I posted before), and I'm climbing straight up to 'okayness'. I'll be fine, I'm sure of that. They say time is the best healer, well, in this case, facebook helps a little too. At least it keeps my mind off things.

But I honestly haven't been doing much as I should have. You know, I have yet rise up to star-dom, so what is there to tell? Me going to library a few days ago? Yeah, right, you would have rather shoot yourself before you actually pretended to be interested. I should be insulted, but I wouldn't inflict that upon myself, let alone you.

So instead, I would just say something real quick. Why is it, that most of the time, people worry about you more than you worry about yourself? Me, personally. I'm someone who absolutely has no sense of danger. When I got really sick, I would think of it as just a temporary cold which would pass immediately. When a guy got me alone in a room, I would say that he just wanted to talk, or recite poems. When I bled, I would shrug it off. Do I make sense? It's like, people around me are a lot more concerned about my well-being and my safety more than I can say for myself. And it's not like I don't care, or that I consciously look for danger, but I think I have always belittled things, you know. The weird thing is, I only do that to myself. Why do I feel as if I'm invisible to danger? I mean, do I have to be raped first before I realize that I shouldn't be alone in a room with guys I barely know? You see, that's just the extreme example. Back home, I got this awful red eye for weeks, and it was only after a while that I had the initiative to go to the doctor to get it checked. And he told me I got an infection, which should be quite serious if it was left untreated. He gave me some eyedrops and asked me go back to him after a week. Did I go back there after a week? Bummer, no. My dad was crazy about it, he kept scolding me but I never got around to it. In the end, fortunately, everything is okay now but it could just easily be not okay. The virus could possibly still be there, looming in my eyes, waiting for the time to hatch again (ew!) but even I can't understand why couldn't I just go to the doctor and get it over with, for good. I don't know. But not having a sense of danger is dangerous, man.

Ah. I just got my result for my philosophy subject. You remember that? All the discussion on Aristotle, Plato, Ethics of happiness, Utilitarian, John Stuart Mill, Archaic culture? Well, okay, you got the point. I did the final assignment back home, and I remembered talking to my friend a few days ago about it, he said the teacher only wanted like, 12 pages max, and he wanted it in double-spacing, although beats me, how did I not know that? I was in the class too, wasn't I? Then why did I write some 27-pages-narcissistic-piece on 'the world according to me' and in single spacing, some more? I was so convinced I would get a C or something. No teacher would wanna read some ramblings from a student when he already told the class he only wanted twelve-pages-paper, although the student could defend herself that she absolutely had no idea about it. It's because all you did in my class is talk, talk, talk, and talk!

Which I don't think is true. I think I made a very good student, despite my coming to class late a few times, and cutting the second half of lecture once in every blue moon. Bollocks!

Considering all those aspects, I guess it's a good thing I had an A-minus. Although, what is the minus for? It's like, the paper is so brilliant, but the teacher was having a bad day when he marked it, so 'ah, let me add a MINUS in it because I'm not feeling so gorgeous today...'

"Apparently Unaffected"

You were the one that got me
One who cheered me up in moody days
Kept me grounded when I'm insane
And the one who laughed at my slurry jokes
Despite my imperfectness, you made me feel
Like I was enough

Where did we go wrong

When did time finally take its toll

How did things get this bad

Who decided to let go

And said that this is the end

I'm sorry

For I'm not apparently unaffected

But let everything comes out in the open

Because I'm not apparently unaffected

Against my better judgment I trusted you

Now I realized it was a foolish move

Because to you, words don't mean a thing

And promises are too soon forgotten

But there is no reason to be cruel

You could have just shutted up

Instead of making empty promises

I would have rather heard nothing at all

But I hate myself

For not being apparently unaffected

And for letting you see the weaker side of me

Because I'm not apparently unaffected

I come to realize that I misread your moods

And expectations

I wasn't blithely aware of you unspoken wants

You still have yet to explore

So just go away and leave me alone

Because I will be okay

You will have to live with yourself

Knowing that you've spent your life telling lies

So I keep on breathing

Because you are not the air

So I keep on walking

Because nothing's worth looking back for

And I'm done with waiting

For life is simply too short

And I'm done with running

For there's nothing worth fighting for

I had my moments of shame

Unfortunate and inevitable regrets

My share times of clueless fumblings

But I'm not the one losing pride

At the end of the day your true colors are shown

Your real face is rippling to the surface

And I learn my lesson

For I need to be apparently unaffected

To you, for making me stronger

To you, to the one that got away

And for no looking back.

Getting in Touch with Mother Nature?

So, I actually got around to make it to the Botanical Garden yesterday, and whereas you won't see me stopping in the middle of the street just to admire blossoming leaves and analysing whether they are monocotile or dicotile (people don't actually do that, do they?), I really enjoyed the trip itself. Okay, using the word 'trip' seems like the garden is hundred kilometres away and we had to dive, cycle, crawl, run, row, and try not to kill ourselves in the process just to get there. To be fair, let me say that the garden is just near Orchard, okay.

See? Now you don't seem so interested anymore. I knew I should have gone for dramatic effect. Bugger.

On the hind side, our little tiny outing didn't exactly run smoothy as we hoped for. Well, just between you and me, I was hoping for a sunny day with a side of cloudy so it wouldn't get too hot and I wouldn't die perspiring or worse, looking beyond awful (I need to get my priorities sorted out). And I don't know, maybe if I would encounter some exotic looking animals, I would sing and the birds would follow me and dance along, and the day would involve some rainbows and beautiful sunset.

Was it really too much to ask, you think?

Never mind, I knew you wouldn't understand. A girl has to have an active imagination, okay. So anyway, where was I? Ah yes, there's a good reason why we looked like we just got slimed in the picture. No, we weren't swimming in the lake with bunch of swans, neither were we fighting over who got to feed the fish and ending up pushing each other to the water, we are civilised human beings, if not anything. What happened was, the rain ruined it all. Yes, just soon after I mentioned 'I love the weather today, it's a bit cloudy so I'm not sweating, see? I wish everyday could be more like this', the thunders stroke and I swear I heard someone laugh as if say, 'you like this weather? I GIVE you real weather!' C'mon, are you kidding me? I completely just jinxed it! Bloody hell!

By that time we were just going in the garden and it's called garden for a reason, meaning it's outdoor, okay! Once it's raining, you basically just...get stuck. And that's how we started this-so-called-rainbows-sunset-trip. We were trapped in a little bungalow and the rain was just crazy beyond belief and oh, the wind! Half an hour later, we were soaked in water, we were shivering, and we were cursing. Okay, he didn't curse, I did. He just kept apologizing, for what, I'm not sure.

Luckily (yes, it could only get better, no?), eventually the rain subsided, leaving only drizzle and it was at least safe to walk again, You know, safe from being stroke by the lighting? Safe from getting blown away by the wind?


So off we went, and there's the map of the garden, pretty big, huh? The entrance was at the far end of the left and we managed to walk all the way round the path.



The thing about going just the two of us again? Just a little bit troublesome to take pictures! So far we've encountered strangers who just couldn't count 1,2,3, those who stood so far away you'd think we're epidemic or something, those whose hands seemed to be catching parkinsons out of a sudden, those who looked suspicious they might rob my camera, well. Thank goodness for them or these pictures wouldn't be here.

So, that's the National Orchird Garden, which we had to pay to get in. At that time, we didn't know how much it cost so we just didn't bother. Later on, we found out that for students actually it was just one buck. Bloody hell again.


It was taken at the 'Shaw Foundation Symphony Stage'. Word has it that they held music perfomances here sometimes, that could be interesting although I never seemed to have heard anything about it.


See?


There's bound to be some flowers, right? I did not pick it out okay, I'm Miss. Environment now.


We found this funny-looking huppah. I told him how people usually got married right in the middle of it. Oh, bless the tripod and the 10-seconds-timer shot!


This 'evolution garden' was quite interesting, there were years-mark right on the road every some hundred metres or so to chronologically resemble how the earth looked like according to the year. So for instance, it was, say, 400 million years ago, then there would be stonehenges, volcanoes and ancient-looking rocks.


...or something like this.


..and this.

The year went way up to 'present day', and by then we would have been back to the original route so we could continue our walk forward.


Admiring the purplish blossoming flowers.

He said during weekends when the weather is actually being friendly to manhood, people just come here to sit on the grass and have picnic, read books, chill, whatever. Wow, that is great. I think my memory of actually being in a garden and sit by the grass was when I was so small when my family went to the Bogor Botanical Garden and I would just run around wildly. Mom then would call up our names and we would sit on the mat to eat our lunches along with so many other families doing exactly the same all around us. I haven't thought about it for the longest time. I miss that.

So this might not be an exotic animal, but there's something about swans! This is actually really great, cos the swan was initially up far away in the lake and we just came closer to get better look at it. Suddenly it swam right up to us, made a calling sound and another swam approached us too! They actually walked to us from the pond to the land and they just came so close to us that I had to run back a little. Hey, swans are not carnivores, right? Ha!


Look at that, it was initially that far!


...and suddenly there were two! And they were literally marching right up to us. Oh wow, I think that's the higlight of the day.


They were walking around for a while in the land while I was too busy being amazed, and they went back up to the lake and swam away together.

I was saying this to my friend, "where are the white swans? They would look so prettier in the picture!" and he called me 'swan-ist' if there is such word! Hey, just to make things clear, I have no problem with black swans, okay!


..the closest we could get to a real sunset. Oh well, the rainbow will have to wait.


So the night fell. We were tired for walking and we found this on the way back. Something magical about the water, even though it might have just been the lights.

Aside from having exhausting ourselves, we were hungry. Personally I could eat an entire cow myself!

We had our dinner at Holland Village (and this time we actually made it!) and because I don't see any 'a whole cow' up in the menu, I settled for cheese prata! There weren't that many choices there but I loved the cheese nevertheless.

And here's to a day, which could have been better, but could have been a lot worse, so...ah sod it! It's a great day!

You and A Trip Gone Wrong.

I know it's probably not healthy to be pissed off at this time of the day. After all, it's still 3 in the afternoon, and they say you're not allowed to get drunk before midnight. Well, at least when you're drunk, you have the excuse not to behave like yourself, and people forgive you for it.

I have all this anger towards you. Anger is probably not the right word, what, then? Dissapointment? Confusion? No, wait, make it anger too.

I'm a big girl, I'll be okay, whatever it is you're afraid to tell me. I don't know, the least you can do is have the decency to talk to me. What, you have the balls to f***ing start things with me and not end it? I know it seems impossible for us, and I'm not a fairy-tale dreamer either. I'll be okay. I'll probably be sad for some time but everyone's bound to feel sad at one point or another. I don't believe that you're only trying to guard me.

I would much rather know everyhing now. It doesn't matter what you're going to say as long as you promise you will be nothing but truthful. Isn't it funny, that I believed in you before, but not now, even though we're supposed to be a lot closer? Where's the logic in that? I think I deserve that, at the very least. Your honesty to set things clear. I just need you to know one thing, that I will really be okay.

I just need to get it off my chest.

As for what's going on with me, not much, actually. School won't start until the end of this month so I have quite a handful of time before then. I'm trying to write and read more (I know I've been reading this Sidney Sheldon book for some time and I'm embarrassed to admit that I'm still yet to finish it! But it's thick and the font is not exactly too friendly for my non-superhuman eyes, okay.) and between times, I'm trying to catch up more with friends and spend time with my sister before she starts working. Apparently by then, she will have been too cool to go out with me, different prestige level, she said. Haha, I'm kidding. She will just be super busy so I need to resort to friends and books to mend my lonely heart.

What else, just two days ago I had a really stupid experience. Okay, I might not known for my talent in 'navigating myself', let alone someone else. But I didn't even realize my mistake right until it's already done, and I have never felt any stupider than that. See, my friend and I were at Orchard after our dinner time, and we were set to go to Holland Village afterwards, the problem was, neither of us knew quite right as which bus to take, but as if that has ever stopped us. (okay, there was that time when we wanted to go to Dempsey Road and we were completely oblivious - but we were smart enough then to just resort to taxi!) Who did we think we were? Feminime version of Indiana Jones, the great adventurer? Ben Gates from National Treasure who dedicated himself to exploring new places and trying not to get killed in between?

But I mean, how difficult could it be, finding a bus from Orchard to Holland Village? I mean, Holland Village is not Timbuktu or anything. Countless buses go there, and Orchard is not Ethiopia either. So we took 123 bus after consulting the bus directory and boy, were we confident. The damn bus didn't come until almost half an hour later, and that was already good thirty minutes of our lives which we would never get back! (exclamation mark!) But fine, since my friend has been talking about how good the cockles were in one of the hawker at Holland V, I beared with it. The thought of cockles were what kept me going! Okay, I know I should've said, 'the lively ambience', or 'the numerous bars', but the cockles were all it's all about.

So finally we were settled in a chilly bus which its air-con was set in intention to turn all of its passengers into ice cubes, which then could be used to replace the melting ice in the Artic. Seriously, who sets the temperature?! The bus went on, and on, and on, and on, and it took us another 30 minutes to finally question where the hell we were. By that time, most passengers have alighted, leaving us with only one-other-probably-lost-too-woman. It was dark outside, and trees were everywhere and I felt like I was on the set of The Jungle Book. The street sign then revealed 'Bt.Permai' and we exchanged blank glances, it might as well show 'You-Stupid-Avenue' or 'Directional Retarded Road' and it wouldn't make any difference since we have never heard a place called Bt Permai in our entire lives.

What happened after was, it wasn't clear whether we just simply have missed our stops in Holland V, or whether we took the wrong bus route to begin with. Either way, we have wasted another hour of our brilliant lives which now didn't feel half as brilliant anymore. What gutted us more was that, we found out that the bus was going to go back to Orchard! Exactly to the same place we were! The exact bus stop which we waited thirty minutes at! If we weren't too busy cursing our own stupidity, we would have been already laughing our asses off.

On the way back to Orchard, though, we passed Clarke Quay and so I just suddenly snapped, 'let's just hop down here. It seems like a smarter move than just go back to where we first started..' And so there you go, the story on how we ended up at Clarke Quay on Friday night and on the time in chronological details when I had to kiss the cockles goodbye.

I'm glad we went there, though! Cockles aside, (what IS with me and cockles? Geez!) Clarke Quay's still a great place to hang out. There's just so much energy.


Ordered this mocktail (forgot the name), but it was too sour for my taste. The thing about going out just the two of us, it was rather troublesom to take pics cos we had to constantly ask for passers-by and waitresses' help.

So at least by the end of the night we didn't curse as much anymore, and we accepted the fact that we were directionally challenged people, and one lesson we learnt the hard way: when in doubt, just hail a cab!

No, seriously. I felt so embarrassed. It's not my fault my brain's made of by cells oblivious of the word 'map', 'navigation', 'streets', and 'avenues'. That must have been our first lousiest moments in 2008, and it's not even a month yet.

Compared to that incident, my yesterday's trip with Sis to Kallang seemed like a monumental achievement, although at a point we were struggling to find the right bus stop from the station to take us to the Leisure Park, but at least it didn't cost us our youth! An hour of my youth, don't remind me. Can you see my wrinkles already?

Doctor's Order

"See, you got yourself what it's called the narcissistic personality disorder..The symptoms of narcissistic personality disorder revolve around a pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, and sense of entitlement. Often individuals feel overly important and will exaggerate.....let's discuss this over the steak....You can tell me all about your worries while I eat.."

We Are So Bright

In heated and passionate discussion over crab, mussels and squids..

Me: "Sis, do you know that Hilary Clinton won 40% of the US Presidential candidate in the beginning of this year?"

Sis: "Ah, yes, I read about it, Barack Obama was the second, right?"

Me: "Yes! 32%! How close!"

Sis: "How exciting!"

Me: "We're suckers for American politics!"

Sis: "Ah yes..oh..and you know that John McCain....that Republican..."

Me: "Oh and that..the actual president will only be selected on the 20th January next year.."

Sis: "Wow..magic.."

And this is how we had our lunch.